Original Image: Steven Humor

The Tracker on my pages reveals various search phrases that were used by random users, as a result of which they landed on one of my pages. Since my Tracker keeps bringing in new wisdom every now and then, you can expect the list below to keep growing until all server space is exhausted, so don't forget to check this orgy of stupidity, banality, illiteracy and perversion once in a while for a good laugh.

If, on the other hand, you find yourself landing here after having searched for phrases like on this list below, don't despair! Your are in GOOD COMPANY with all the rest of the ID^C^C^C..., err, curious people who have searched for similar phrases!

Update: As of some time prior to 2019, the major Search Engines stopped sharing keyword content, as a result of which trackers now fail to bring in search keywords, so no new wisdom can be added to this page. In the mean time, several general forums have been created specifically designed for asking specific questions (like Quora). The latter proved to be a much more efficient attracting locus and hence a gigantic treasure trove of concentrated stupidity (now in the form of complete/full questions!) - given that the vast majority of people who search for things have gotten extra lazy or unwilling to go through Search Engine search results. It was decided therefore to extend this page by including some such questions. Will be slowly and carefully collected and added to section "Quora Questions!", below the already existing contents. Be sure to check for future updates often.

Here are some of the jewels, classified roughly on content.

1. Sex, f*cking Machines, Wanking, Animal Sex, Perversions!!
2. Math, Computers, Physics, Biology, Geography, History, Science, Science Projects, Science Fiction, Einstein!!
   
3. Art, Music, MIDI, Composers, Pianists, Painters!!
4. Philosophy, Religion, Faith, Metaphysics, Demons, Priests, Mythology, The Meaning of Life!!
5. Matrix!!
6. Sociology, Politics, Lawyers, Human Relations, Sports, Boyfriends, Girlfriends, Advertising!!
7. Medicine, Doctors, Diseases, Insanity, Dementia, Schizophrenia, Paranoia, Desperation!
8. Illucidity, Nonsense, Bullshit!
9. Quora Questions!

1. Sex, f*cking Machines, Wanking, Animal Sex, Perversions!!
   • "do women fall in love with their dogs and horses and have sex with them"-Yes they do, if you are a LOSER and a LOUSY f*ck.
   • "do women give birth if f*cked by horse"-Of COURSE they do. The result is a CENTAUR, who will beat the SHIT out of you when he finds out who you are.
   • "do women vomit while giving head"-Yes, if your dick looks like my ASS.
   • "can a horse give a blow job"-Why don't you ask one? Be gentle. Give it a SUGAR CUBE first.
   • "has anyone f*cked a horse"-No. Be the FIRST and give us an interesting REPORT!.
   • "Is there any disadvantages when dog f*cks a boy"-Absolutely not. It's perfectly SAFE. Try it with your kid.
   • "husband holds wife while dog f*cks her"-THAT's the meaning of a GOOD marriage. The husband to ALWAYS be helping his wife.
   • "the good wife riding machine"-It's the GOOD wife riding machine. The BAD wife riding machine is a f*ckING machine.
   • "is it against bible to let dog screw you"-Of course not. The Old Testament is practically an OPERATING MANUAL for zoophile PERVERTS.
   • "I watch the kids and do chores while my wife sucks black cock"-This guy's wife sure is a WINNER!
   • "assist women giving pussy for horse"-No, YOU ASSIST them, MORON. That way they'll know that their husbands are f*cking LOSERS.
   • "DIRTY OLD MEN WANKING WITH OTHER MEN"-How DISGUSTING can one be? MORE than THIS? I don't think so...
   • "the dog f*cked her while they clapped"-It's the AMAZING CLAPPING dog! Your guests CLAP and the dog f*ckS any available women in the house. Guaranteed or your money BACK!
   • "she died from f*ckin a horse"-And what the f*ck do YOU care? You wanna try it?
   • "grandma wanking a horse"-GRANDMA has a preference. It's HORSES!.
   • "horse and donkeu f*ck onlu hairu women"-Horses and donkeUs have a preference for hairU onlU. CoOL!.
   • "tricky dicky f*cking machine loonies"-Won't find more looney f*cking machine phrases than here.
   • "old men wanking and ares f*cking"-Let's try to find old men wanking, together with Ares, the God of War. After they are done, Ares will BEAT THE SHIT out of them.
   • "my wife f*cks buddy wearing boots"-His MAIN HOBBY is rocky-mountain CLIMBING. He F*CKS women on the side.
   • "went to the barn to do my chores and found by brother f*cking a cow"-He couldn't handle his last rejection by a woman well, so he thought of trying a different venue for success. Btw, why don't you try the horse, yourself?. If you give it a sugar cube, it will be gentle on you.
   • "Magda horse blowjob"-She did it. Magda gave the horse a blow-job. Well, it sort of figures, given that you are a loser.
   • "dogs_for_my_cunt@web.de"-The email address of the CUNT DOGS.
   • "When a horse,dog,donkey and pig f*cks a women dose that women fall pregnent?"-When a TOTAL MORON asks the search engine a TOTALLY STUPID question, does the search engine have a right to kill him? Can we program a javascript to that extent? Discuss.
   • "when i go to my wife and entermy peni in the fuke my mani come out please tell some thing to spend m"-This almost CRASHED my SPELL-CHECKER!.
   • "adam and eve please f*ck my wife xxx"-Confused Bible husband needs Adam and Eve to have a threesome with his wife.
   • "chick getting covered with sperm from horse elephant no download"-Covered with sperm, but NO download. What the...?.
   • "how to tell if a girl has been banged by their brother"-Ask her brother, genius. Sheesh.
   • "would a girl get pregnant if a horse cummed in her?"-ONLY if the horse CUMMED. Nice little horsie.
   • "women being f*cked by invisible men"-They are the infamous INVISIBLE men. They go around cloaked and f*ck women. Then the women wonder what happened and how they got pregnant.
   • "the invisible cock pounded my wifes pussy as she slept"-It's the HUMONGOUS cock of the INVISIBLE MAN. See above.
   • "i have drank elephant cum"-Was it good? Should we try it?.
   • "is it safe for men to get f*cked by male horses?"-YES! It's VERY safe, but you have to try it FIRST, to know for yourself.
   • "A woman who give a horse a BJ and then vomits up horse semen!"-She's got indigestion from the horse sperm.
   • "www.real women f*ckin there animals.com"-Thinks he can get better credit after searching for this kind of porn. Sweet Jesus help us.
   • "woman wich make f*ck with horse"-Anyone know of woman wich make f*ck? Horses preferable.
   • "vulba of elephent jpg"-ElephEnt vulBa. What the...?
   • "small penis loser boi eat your cum for me"-Random internet loser projecting.
   • "www.my pussy is so small i can not f*ck with horse.com"-What a SHAME. The HORSE will be SO disappointed.
   • "i wish donkey f*ck my wife xxx"-Your wife is THAT good, eh? It figures. She's the wife of a RETARD.
   • "cartoons of women f*cked by eliphants"-The elIphants like them a lot!.
   • "why i let the dog f*ck me"-Why indeed. Because you are a lousy f*ck and only dogs are interested in you?.
   • "why does horseriding give me an erection?"-Because you are a f*cking PERVERT/MORON?.
   • "www.girls being f*cked by bulls, horses, elephants.com"-The TREMENDOUS web site!.
   • "can human girl gets f*cked by elephant?"-If the elephant sees this sentence, it will TRAMPLE you to death, moron.
   • "put a watermellon in your cunt"-I don't have a cunt, sport. Why don't you put in in your BUTT, instead?.
   • "stealing a f*ck while she sleeps"-This dude is so desperate, he tries to devise a stealing scheme while his wife is asleep to get laid.
   • "let a dog f*ck my wife"-Who's holding you back? Do it and then you can sell your wife at the bazaar for a good price.
   • "i vow no white cock will ever enter my white cunt again ever"-Try the black SALAMI, princess!
   • "http://www.Horse-f*cks a girl.cs"-It's the all NEW web site!.
   • "www.woman gets f*ckt by animals and show there pink ugly open pussy pics"-Got f*ckt by letters, when I saw this phrase.
   • "free videos of a girl giving a cow a blowjob and then getting a facial"-The 'cow-blowjob'. Safe, easy and produces milk. Don't try it with a bull, though, because the results might be unexpected.
   • "how to get a male horse to f*ck you"-Dude wants to be f*cked by male horse. Gives new meaning to the phrase: 'has severe psychological problems with the Father figure'.
   • "My brother f*cking machine"-His brother is a f*cking machine. Evolution at work. Look, listen and learn and some day you can be a f*cking machine, too!
   • "ejaculated on f*cking machine"-It works! The f*cking machine works! Now don't forget to use it every time, so as to spare us from having to deal with your descendants.
   • "blowjob-trainer under machine"-The new exciting job: Blow-job trainer under a f*cking machine. Gets paid by the hour. Group discounts available.
   • "how do it feel when a dog cums in a women"-Doesn't know how it FEELS, but likes to think about it. Why not try it?.
   • "what does my dream mean wife being raped by a horse"-It means that your wife is f*ckING behind your back with someone who has a MUCH BIGGER dick than yours.
   • "intrept the meaning of dream that my wife is being f*cked by someone"-The interpretation of the dream is that your wife IS being f*cked by someone.
   • "the meaning when your wife says i got f*cked stupid"-The meaning is that your wife GOT f*ckED, stupid.
   • "Zoo Elephantd fuks pussy"-Crazy Elephantd on the loose! Call 911.
   • "i f*ck white cunts with my black cock and make them pregnant"-Sure. And then the mother gives birth in the toilet to avoid raising up a MORON.
   • "donkey elefant horss dog faking garls"-Somebody go kill this moron before he gets a chance to procreate.
   • "witch f*cken hole dose the penis go in"-Oh brother. Illiterate, sex-starved and using a COMPUTER. God help us all.
   • "where i can put my penis in the women pic?"-Another guy who wants to put his penis SOMEWHERE, but doesn't know WHERE.
   • "witch hole is the pussy"-It's the one you came out of, MORON.
   • "show me an actual cunt hole"-Isn't the net a wonderful place? It helps you see things which you are NEVER gonna see in real life, if you are an IDIOT.
   • "her cunt homework she f*cked the professor"-Somebody's girlfriend f*cked the professor in exchange for a good grade. Well, can't win'em all now, can we?
   • "show me dog cum"-Another curious IDIOT.
   • "my dog cums in me"-Good job, princess. Next assignment is the horse in your barn-yard.
   • "dogcum cow milking"-Wannabe scientist considering PATENTING the practice.
   • "black f*cks white puss"-Something or someone black attempting intercourse with a small cat. Wonderful.
   • "cunt f*cked by foot"-That's RIGHT. If you have a small penis, you can use your FOOT.
   • "i hide many things in my cunt hole"-Can you hide a WATERMELON in there?
   • "biggest object put in vagina"-An AIRPLANE. It's the BIGGEST thing you can put in there.
   • "videos of a girl putting a whole bottle in her vagina"-Full of soda, too!
   • "watermelon masturbation"-Couldn't you find anything BIGGER?
   • "guy f*cking watermelon before blowjob"-Yeap. The guy needed some good stimulation before the blowjob, so he chose to f*ck a huge FRUIT. BRAVO stud.
   • "pepperoni in cunt"-You've got the RIGHT idea. Then, salami in cunt and afterwards boloney in cunt, and finally foot in cunt!
   • "a woman has been f*cked"-ONLY ONE? Thousands are being probed every day.
   • "she get f*cked by a horse dog"-Yeap. SIMULTANEOUSLY by a horse and a dog. Or individually by a strange creature: A 'horse-dog'!
   • "male horse f*cking male human: looking for pointers"-Here's a good pointer for ya: You are A f*ckING PERVERT!
   • "human male f*cking female horse on ladder"-This fella wants to try something exciting and new!
   • "getting f*cked by a horse sounds a bit painful"-You don't SAY! Why don't you TRY it and then tell us.
   • "the science of getting f*cked by a horse"-That's right. It's a prerequisite college course for Anthropology 250.
   • "horse f*cking mastercard"-Yes. The next step is to have the horse f*ck a credit card.
   • "will a large dog f*ck my bubble butt if i let him"-Why don't you try it? Show your dog your butt to test its intentions.
   • "butt sucking procedure"-This dude wants to find out how to suck BUTT. Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK with his exciting research.
   • "shots needle needle or butt or bottom or spanking or fetish butt -fuel"-Kinky fetish with butt needles? NO "fuel", please!
   • "what is a blowjob"-It's a job where you continuously blow wind. It will suit you fine!
   • "i built a blowjob machine"-CONGRATULATIONS on your new and interesting engineering project, dude!
   • "doctor look cunt"-YES, doctor! PLEASE look cunt!
   • "doctors f*cking patients"-Conference at 11:00. ALL specialties invited.
   • "doctors looking at your penis and f*cking it"-HELP! The doctors f*cked my PENIS during general anaesthesia!
   • "fake doctors looking at naked girls"-That's RIGHT. Be careful when you choose your practitioner.
   • "how do u tell that a woman has been f*cked"-If your entire foot fits in her pussy, she DEFINITELY has.
   • "how can u tell from looking at a pussy if it has been f*cked a lot"-If it's your WIFE's, it DEFINITELY has. Not by you, though.
   • "wanking off tutorial"-Even ANIMALS know how to masturbate, genius. You don't need a TUTORIAL for it. Just follow your INSTINCT.
   • "scientific disadvantages of male wanking?"-Haven't you HEARD, already? You'll get HAIRY palms and eventually you'll go BLIND!
   • "do engineers masturbate?"-NEVER. Engineers ALWAYS take a vow of celibacy to avoid Murphy's Law.
   • "I want to meet and f*ck people from Greece free without registration"-Sorry, registration IS required.
   • "f*cking women without registration"-What is it with those idiots who always go after the freebies? Registration IS REQUIRED!
   • "australopithecines wanking"-That's RIGHT. Unbeknownst to most anthropologists, australopithecines started walking ERECT, in order to FREE their hands for MASTURBATION.
   • "wife has hairy cunt"-Do you mind lending her to me for a while?
   • "wife likes big penis"-Tough luck, sport. Try those penis enlargement patches.
   • "grandma showing her hairy cunt to anyone who look"-That's MY kind of grandma! Way to go!
   • "most hairy female cunt known"-It's grandma's. See above.
   • "let's suck grandma's cunt"-YEAH! Let's GO! What are you waiting for?
   • "grandma being f*cked by dog"-That's one BRAVE dog. Must be ol' Rusty.
   • "older women who like to get there hairy cunt ate"-Let's give this guy a hand to find older women 'who like to get there hairy cunt ATE'. 2 spelling and 1 syntax mistakes all in one sentence. WooHoo!.
   • "who wants there pussy ate know"-Another English PROFESSOR searching the net.
   • "do women like their pussy ate"-And AGAIN...
   • "i play with my wife's pussy while she sleeps"-That's RIGHT. Cause when she's awake she's f*cking the HORSE, loser.
   • "the dog ate Maria's pussy"-While you were sitting there WANKING OFF, eh? Now, THERE's a good f*cking PERVERT.
   • "f*ck my wife"-This guy needs a DIVORCE, quick.
   • "wife needs to be f*cked"-So WHAT THE HELL are you doing WASTING your time on the NET? Don't you have a JOB TO DO?
   • "can horse riding cause orgasms?"-No, but the HORSE can. Use with CAUTION!
   • "i want horse riding then we f*cked"-Boring AND Illiterate. YAWWWWNNNNNNnnnnn.
   • "phrases for men who cum quick"-Here's one: You are a f*cking LOSER.
   • "before i could ask her out she slept with a loser"-Tough luck, sport. It happened to me too. Find another penis box.
   • "how to f*ck a female cow"-You'd obviously need a ladder and a RED CAPE. Make sure a male BULL is around when you attempt it.
   • "procedure to f*ck"-Would you like a Pascal or C procedure for that?
   • "procedure to f*ck a woman"-Ah, that's BETTER. At least this guy wants a SPECIFIC procedure.
   • "elephant dick size"-Visit the zoo and stay in an elephant cage for a while. I am sure the gentle animal will oblige after a while.
   • "elephant dick growing"-Another elephant DICK-LOVER. Let's direct him/her to an appropriate website, shall we?
   • "elephant penis cum"-Common people! Let's help this guy find sites with elephants CUMING. Extra bonus if you can find sites with elephants MASTURBATING.
   • "elephant dick young,cum"-Cum, little young elephant! Show us your DICK!
   • "Dicks for elephants,dogs,horses & cats pics"-This dude is curious! Let's help him find out more about the object of his desire!
   • "obscure secret f*cking"-YAAAAAAAWWNNN.
   • "nailed without a condom"-WOW, you did it, sparky! When you get the CLAP or AIDS, give us a ring.
   • "my penis throbbed as i ejaculated inside her"-YAAAAAAAWWNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
   • "f*cking dog animal sex no virus"-Somebody hasn't LEARNED their LESSON, I guess.
   • "jerk my wife hairy cunt"-What do you have in mind, sport?
   • "riding a horse makes her cum"-Uh oh. I think your girlfriend's BOUND to give you TROUBLE after a while. Find another one.
   • "the zoo guy f*cked by horse"-Yeah, he forgot to close the zoo cage door and the horse caught him off guard.
   • "my wife got f*cked with a horse"-You should 've been more careful, buddy.
   • "videos of woman been f*cked by horse"-Adolescents looking for ACTION. Geez... What NEXT?
   • "guy who dies getting f*cked by a horse"-This feller is VERY curious!
   • "lady gives horse a blowjob and dies"-It was the lady's last wish. She died from excitement after the horse came in her mouth.
   • "pictures of women being f*cked by big dogs"-What I don't understand is how these searches end up on my web pages...
   • "women f*cking fruits"-That's RIGHT: Either women are f*cking fruits, or...they are f*cking fruits. Which one?
   • "a girl giving blowjob to a horse"-YES, my friend. T'is GOOT.
   • "procedure for giving blowjob to wife"-This guy is married to a woman with a PENIS.
   • "+f*cked "poker" -online -video -she -woman -girl -female -texas"-There you have it fellas: The MOTHER of ALL search phrases...
   • "how to have a dog f*ck you"-LEAVE the POOR animals ALONE, you PERVERT!
   • "wife likes f*cking dog"-BUMMER. My suggestion? UPGRADE. Tell her to try a HORSE. After the horse, try an ELEPHANT.
   • "wife f*cking our dog"-That's the price you have to pay for buying a wife from the BAZAAR.
   • "human horse interspecies mating"-Have you TRIED the obvious and it failed or are you just looking for INFO?
   • "eat my mom pussy out"-Oedipus exhalted. The word MOTHERf*ckER comes to mind...
   • "son screws moms brains out while she sleeps"-ANOTHER motherf*cker on the loose...
   • "pepperoni cock"-Kinky guy, this one. He or she likes it HOT and LONG.
   • "women f*cked with ape"-Someone has kinky sexual fantasies, again...
   • "women f*cking bats"-Anyone? Let's help this guy find women f*cking some large bats. VAMPIRE bats preferred.
   • "women f*cking baseball bats"-Would you like YOURS to be doing that? Better order some VIAGRA, QUICK.
   • "women with a baseball bat in her cunt"-Another LOSER in desperate need of VIAGRA.
   • "women f*cking donkeys"-What's da matter? No local HORSES available?
   • "are there any sites showing girls getting f*cked by horse or donkeys"-Plenty. Unfortunately you hit a site which makes FUN of IDIOTS who search for this stuff. Enjoy.
   • "pictures on mating of horse,elephant and donkeys showing their big penis"-Let's give the guy a helping hand to prepare his report for Anthropology 101.
   • "woman f*cked by salami"-Yes. A BOLOGNA salami. WTF?
   • "baseball bat in the vulva"-'vulva' refers to the EXTERNAL parts of a vagina. You cannot put a baseball bat in the EXTERNAL parts of a vagina, IDIOT.
   • "machines f*cking"-The future script of Terminator. Check with Hollywood, dude!
   • "little white f*cking machines"-Check it out! Not only 'f*cking machines', but 'little, white' ones! One wonders what this fella has in mind...
   • "used f*cking machines"-Check with eBay. They might have one for SALE.
   • "how to build my own butt f*cking machine"-Exciting science fair PROJECT you've got there, sparky.
   • "f*ck videos of men being f*cked by an machines"-The Hollywood script writers should have added this little obscure part to the TERMINATOR series. They probably forgot.
   • "get my wife to try my f*cking machine"-This guy's wife has second thoughts about his f*cking machine. Don't know if it's any good or not...
   • "build my f*cking machine"-Somebody DO SOMETHING about these morons who want a 'f*cking machine'. Do you know there are creatures called 'females'/'males' out there? Try them some time.
   • "f*cking machines exhausted vacuum cleaner"-This genius is contemplating using a vacuum cleaner for testicular release. What NEXT?
   • "blowjob machine vacuum instructions"-There we go, AGAIN.
   • "blowjob using a vacuum cleaner"-Another ADVENTUROUS feller!
   • "huge boobs and the vacuum cleaner"-The title of the guy's new BOOK.
   • "cannot sit butt hurts"-You've been BUSY lately, eh?
   • "f*cking machine doctors"-What did I tell you? Somebody FINALLY had an accident with those "f*cking machines". Serves you RIGHT, buddy.
   • "Porno of Doctors f*cking there own patient movies"-Let's all give this guy a HELPING HAND to find porno of doctors f*cking "there" MOVIES. I wonder who has to be more PATIENT: The MOVIE or the DOCTOR f*cking it.
   • "doctors f*cking there patients while there asleep"-You DON'T have to worry. Doctors like f*cking LITERATE patients while 'there'² asleep.
   • "how to lock porno jpg"-This dude is so excited about his .jpg PORNO collection, he wants to LOCK the photos, so nobody steals them.
   • "f*ck with pregnant"-TSK, tsk, tsk...
   • "elephant masturbator"-Is that what you do for a living, buddy?
   • "who's giving the horse a blowjob?"-Your WIFE, while you are at work?
   • "female giving horse a blow job until it cums"-Same answer as above.
   • "instructions for a girl to give a horse an erection"-Don't worry friend. Horses INSTINCTIVELY know which females are RECEPTIVE. If the horse sees your girlfriend and is not interested, it's a BUMMER!
   • "Horse gives guy a blowjob"-Yes. It's the HORSE's turn now to give a blowjob.
   • "african elephant's dick being sucked"-By YOU? CONGRATULATIONS. You win the PERVERT OF THE MONTH award.
   • "dog f*cks woman while she sleeps"-That's one SMART dog, if it can do that trick.
   • "dog f*cks woman by mistake"-It certainly wasn't the DOG's mistake...
   • "dog f*cks unsuspecting girl"-Yes, the girl was very UNSUSPECTING and the dog took advantage of it.
   • "rusty dog f*cks girl"-Good ol' Rusty! He did it AGAIN!
   • "dog f*cks grandma's cunt"-Dogs seem to be particularly POPULAR in perverts' minds.
   • "ape f*cks woman"-CHECK IT OUT! Film at 11:00 am!
   • "bull f*cks girl"-If the bull can do that without killing her, they should give him a prize.
   • "guy f*cks masturbator"-Yes. The next step is to f*ck a WALL.
   • "woman f*cks elephant"-EVERYBODY! DOCUMENTARY at 3:00 pm!
   • "woman gets f*cked by elepahtn"-The 'elepahtn': A strange, as of yet unclassified animal. Has six feet, one hand and twenty heads with three eyes on each head. WooHoo!
   • "woman f*cks watermelon"-...and DIES afterwards?
   • "guy f*cks vacuum cleaner"-He probably doesn't have anything BETTER to do...
   • "woman f*cks vacuum"-I bet he means "vacuum cleaner". Wait: It could be "vacuum bulb" or something else I can't think of...
   • "boy f*cks grand mom"-Makes her CUM, too!
   • "guy f*cks watermelon"-...and then SELLS it to unsuspecting hungry customers?
   • "f*cks watermelon"-Your boyfriend?
   • "elephant f*cks girl"-Was it a TRAUMATIC experience, little girl?
   • "veterinarian f*cks horse"-Yeap! A MALE horse, too. Better watch out who your veterinarian is and what he does when you are not there.
   • "male f*cks horse vulva"-Male WHAT? Human? You, I presume.
   • "doctor f*cks elephant"-Your average medical practitioner's dirty little secret.
   • "dog f*cks veterinarian"-This completes the f*cking circle.
   • "mac f*cks horse"-Now we have a computer doing a horse. What next?
   • "ghost f*cks woman"-Passing to metaphysics, now. NEEEEXT!
   • "horse f*cks owner"-The horse was a bit horny and got confused.
   • "large horse f*cks female to death"-It's the new fad for bored wives. Watch out dude.
   • "woman f*cks vacuum"-Ghost or vacuum cleaner? Which one dude?
   • "f*ck me she male horse f*ck"-This ingenious feller wants to be f*cked by a 'she-male' horse. We'll wait for further instructions...
   • "my first f*ck was my grand dad"-Talk about dirty old men, eh?
   • "f*cked by my grand dad"-Did the old man have a big schlong?
   • "dream about being f*cked by dirty old pervert"-The new generations are getting BETTER, day by day.
   • "dirty old men with big donkeys wanking"-Who's wanking? The dirty old men or their donkeys?
   • "baseball bat ass -'goo goo dolls' f*ck"-What the f*ck?!
   • "Chester the molester"-Somebody's been reading too many Hustler magazines. If only the "Chester" cartoonist was good, too...
   • "nude girl attachι"-Wouldn't you like THAT, now?
   • "I like it black porno magazine"-Don't forget to visit your local ZOO and check the horses out. Ask a veterinarian to help you out with some of the more "elaborate" functions of these useful animals.
   • "oh grandma his black cock feels so goo in my cunt"-EASY now, little girl. I've got a horse to sell for a good price, if you are interested.
   • "black-cock in-my-cunt"-ANOTHER adventurous little girl with high AMBITIONS.
   • "vulva beautiful"-She IS, ain't SHE?
   • "I swallowed dog cum will it hurt me"-Oh, Jesus Christ, I'm gonna VOMIT!
   • "pigs copulating"-This fella just remembered his parents.
   • "sexual positions"-If you are old enough to search the net and you still don't know some, you are DOOMED.
   • "kid ejaculated"-CONGRATULATIONS! You (or your kid) have(s) reached puberty.
   • "stay awake masturbate"-Sounds like a GOOD strategy to me.
   • "masturbate while buzzed"-Sounds like a BAD strategy to me.
   • "video guy gets an erection"-Did he really? How do you know? Did you FONDLE him during the video presentation?
   • "f*ck mother"-SHAME on you, idiot.
   • "my brother and I f*cked"-NOBODY CARES! Do it again, if you like.
   • "I f*cked an ape"-And you are PROUD of it? They should probably put you in a ZOO, along with the other PRIMATES.
   • "ape f*ck girl"-That's probably a REAL ape typing at the search engine. A REAL, HORNY ape.
   • "mr potatoe cock"-Yeap. You heard it here FIRST, folks. Mr. Potato-head's COCK.
   • "explain me about penis machine"-How about THAT: It's your HAND until you are literate enough to perform good searches.
   • "penis box"-Yeap! Another synonym for 'your HAND'.
   • "pic women f*cking dogs pigs horse and any other animal they want to"-Another primate on the loose. Call 911.
   • "animal sex (dogs, horses, pigs, snakes and cows are f*cked or f*ck) and shitting videos"-Another animal researching its sexual habits.
   • "i love you daddy please f*ck my pussy"-Something has gone awfully WRONG with this girl.
   • "kids love to be f*cked"-I somehow don't think your explanation will stand up in court, when they get hold of you, you f*cking PEDERAST.
   • "widening my butt"-Another fella with an EXCITING science project. Have you ever heard of BUTT PLUGS? Try one. They are CHEAP!
2. Math, Computers, Physics, Biology, Geography, History, Science, Science Projects, Science Fiction, Einstein!!
   • "i lost chess against my dad"-Yes, dads can do that. Don't forget that "dad" is someone who intervenes so you can be brought out of Χάος into existence.
   • "Why was the greek culture a fertile ground for the arrival of Christanity"-Because they host the GREATEST percentage of FRAUDS, CONS and IDIOTS? Christianity is ATTRACTED to IDIOTS in LARGE GROUPS.
   • "Why would iodine have emission lines of all colors in a spectrometer?"-It doesn't. Even if it did, that's because that's how it was MADE by Nature, you f*cking MORON!
   • "marcrery weper bulb"-What the F***?!
   • "time travel+ computers + algorithms + genius + mathematics + future + bigbang"-Somebody is looking for Einstein. YOOHOO! He's DEAD already!
   • "greek warior war information against the pursuins"-Wants to know about the PERSUINS: An Ancient tribe who gave The Greeks trouble with their stupidity.
   • "infinit exponentil tower"-Doesn't know how to spell, but otherwise desires to know about infinite exponentials. Shoot him with 50cc of Demerol, because if he finds out, he'll want to DIE from the PAIN.
   • "extreem mathametics"-Not only MATHAMETICS, but EXTREEM ones! Prepare to DIE, dude!.
   • "Discreet spectrum through spectroscope"-Only DISCREET spectra please. No embarrassing, careless or UPSETTING spectra through the spectroscope!.
   • "evil vector"-Direction: DOWNWARDS. Magnitude: 666. One EVIL vector.
   • "FORMULA FOR DEVITION ANGLE"-With ALL CAPS. He is SURE it's DEVITION angle!.
   • "what angle to convert prism"-Let's convert A PRISM into AN ANGLE. Good luck to us all.
   • "probability of sitting at a rectangular table"-Not very high, if there's a ROUND table nearby.
   • "why r rays are deviate"-Believe it or not, this guy is investigating minimum deviation on prisms. Somebody SHOOT him, before he manages to procreate.
   • "could it be possible that the ancient greek gods were real fallen angels?"-Sweet Jesus help me, cause I'm gonna VOMIT from the stupidity, here.
   • "HAMP BALLAST FOR HMT MAKE HIGH PRESSURE MERCURY VAPOUR LAMPS"-Let's make a Mercury vapor lamp which uses a HAMP ballast to limit the current.
   • "INDIRAS NET"-INDIRA's Net. Indira Gandi's Net. Gandi used a NET to lure in foreigners.
   • "constriction MATHMATICS"-Boas operate using MATHMATICS. The MATHMATICS of Boa Constrictors.
   • "expidential infinate"-What the f***?.
   • "spectra of black"-Looking for spectra with no light emission. Uh uh.
   • "how many mrcury lamps will be dangerous to humans"-Just one. A very BIG one. For further details: The High Pressure Mercury Vapor Lamp.
   • "The mathametic Pictures to explain"-There are no pictures that explain stupidity.
   • "angel of minimum deviation from graph"-Azor. It's the angel of minimum deviation.
   • "what is the lamps that produce uv as a part of it's emission spectrum"-It's those lamps we use to disinfect idiots like you who can't form syntactically correct sentences.
   • "most beautiful mathematical anomaly"-Mathematics doesn't have anomalies, genius. The "anomaly" is in your head.
   • "murkury vapour lamp"-Murkury: New trans-uranic element, discovered in 2010.
   • "Nobel minds discussion overpopulation"-Nobel Laureates having a discussion about overpopulation? No matter what it is, YOU are not included, dude, cause you can't SPELL.
   • "beutiful mathametics"-Hopes to find pages on mathematics to learn something interesting, but doesn't know how to spell. Here's a clue, sport: Mathematics is HARD, for illiterates. Don't waste your time.
   • "why are the greeks known as the originators?"-Because we invented just about everything which is scientifically important on this planet?
   • "camel intellilgence iq"-Let's give the camel a Mensa test!
   • "IS IT CONCEIVABLE THAT A PERSON MIGHT NOT BE A HUMAN? EXPLAIN?"-What the...?.
   • "cantor set convergest unigrmly"-Looking for a unigrimly convergest function. Cantor will be churning in his grave.
   • "the Greek worriers"-It's the Greek worriers, everybody! They WORRY a lot. When their worrying tolerance is reached, they DESTROY EVERYTHING.
   • "prisme n-1 cosa sina"-prisme cosa nostra. Sina nostra.
   • "osram god of light"-Hmm. The company must be doing fairly well, lately.
   • "triangel archimedes area circel"-The archimedes circel is approximated by tri-angels or tri-demons. WooHoo!
   • "mathemathics explain the reality?"-Before mathematics can explain reality to you, you should learn to SPELL and form syntactically correct sentences, DOOFUS.
   • "how do you find the area of a circle when the perimeter is given?"-Holy Cow! Somebody KICK this kid out of geometry class, BEFORE the professor finds out about his question.
   • "locating uranus with a 60 mm scope"-You will need two mirrors for that, in addition to the 60mm scope.
   • "how to spectrascope using cd"-This dude wants to "spectrascope" using a CD. Let's tell him that he needs to learn to SPELL first.
   • "specrascope color diagram"-A color diagram for a non-existent instrument. OK!
   • "infinitesimal time infinite space cause light events"-Somebody call 911. This guy is planning to travel in time.
   • "what are the mathematical brain teaser"-They is something you'll never know, until you learn how to spell.
   • "function of mathematician"-"A mathematician is a machine for converting coffee into theorems" --- Alfred Renyi
   • "mathematical equations for brain functions"-Here's the equation that describes YOUR brain function: 1=0.
   • "sqrt(sqr(2)sqr(3))"-Somebody NOTIFY this kid's father, URGENTLY!
   • "danger mathematics (pdf)"-DANGER! DANGER Will Robinson! Mathematics .pdf file APPROACHING!
   • "how to solve 1-e=0"-WOWZERS!!!
   • "6 cm how many mm"-HOLY COW! That's a "D" for you in Physics class, sport.
   • "a female mathematician (search the phrase)"-This fella TELLS the search engine what to do! OKAY!
   • "what will a human look like in the year 2020"-We will have VERY BIG BRAINS and HEADS in 2020, to combat stupidity which is now spreading at an ALARMING RATE.
   • "address-list"-This poor guy either lost his address book or doesn't know how to use it and is now looking for it on the NET. Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK!
   • "photos of ramapethicus man"-This guy is looking for PHOTOS of a pithecine that lived at least two million years ago. Anybody travelled in time back then and took some PHOTOS? Hurry up please, this guy is doing RESEARCH!
   • "how to burn motherboard"-You need an appropriate machine language instruction for that. Check the new Tangertas Opcodes out.
   • "f*cking code for round robin in c"-This poor college student is not very happy with his OPERATING SYSTEMS assignment.
   • "how to reach andromeda"-CHECK IT OUT! This guy wants to travel to ANDROMEDA! Let's all give him some good ADVICE! Here's mine: take some LSD. You'll be able to travel ANYWHERE!
   • "prove the zero rule of exponents"-No. YOU prove it, you lazy idiot. Do you KNOW that your DAD is paying for college?
   • "rusty nails experiment"-Let's all give this guy a HELPING HAND with his NEW and INTERESTING science project.
   • "dog cum rusty nails"-If a dog cums on nails will they RUST? Sounds like a fun science project.
   • "genetically engineer flying horse"-Hold on TIGHT. Our engineers are MANUFACTURING one as we speak.
   • "intelligent words converter"-You should be looking for a 'stupid words converter', INSTEAD. Intelligent words are fine the way they are. Leave them ALONE.
   • "big bang david coperfield"-Coperfield is a good illusionist, but don't you think you are asking a BIT MUCH of him?
   • "what do we need to build a golgi?"-Look at your left kitchen DRAWER, where all of your grandma's RECIPES are. Chances are she'd made one at one time or another. If you can't find the recipe, ASK her. Be polite.
   • "genome responsible for life period ?"-If we knew this genius, we'd be IMMORTAL.
   • "proof of lemma 4"-Follows from LEMMA 3. Do a google search on LEMMA 3.
   • "trigonometric orgasms"-This guy gets an ERECTION, whenever he sees equations like cos(pi)=-1.
   • "verify that x=r2"-Are you SURE x equals r2?
   • "if w=f(z), is analytic, then"-Yes? Then WHAT, EINSTEIN?
   • "author research"-YES! ANONYMOUS author research is the latest fad at Harvard. Go for it, sport!
   • "what magnification to make something 100 times bugger"-100 times 'bugger' IS a magnification of 100, Einstein.
   • "constant sequences converge"-If that isn't as OBVIOUS to you as the fact that the Sun RISES every day, you oughta drop out of school, genius.
   • "what is the infinite brain"-it's exactly what you DON'T have.
   • "lawyer phrases with math"-This lawyer fella is determined to WIN his cases at all costs. He plans to use MATHEMATICAL ARGUMENTS to convince the judge.
   • "Mrs virus"-Yeap. She is the wife of Mr. virus.
   • "the ratio of car in the country"-Did you KNOW you could find RATIOS of CARS in the country? No? You should get out more.
   • "the characteristics of suitable light sources"-Anyone? SUITABLE light sources ONLY please!
   • "when did georgie Laforge become chief engineer"-Um, when chief O'Brien left for DS-9?
   • "integrate girlfriend with respect to calculus"-Uh, oh. This guy is a little TOO SERIOUS about calculus. He wants to integrate EVERYTHING and EVERYONE around him. Call 911 QUICK before he does any damage.
   • "what are some examples of nonintegers"-This fella never ate HALF a cookie, a FOURTH of a pie and never drank a THIRD of a full glass of water.
   • "difficult iq test"- Not only an IQ test, but a DIFFICULT one, eh? Are you thinking of applying to MENSA, dude?
   • "stupid iq test trick friends infinite"-Let me GUESS: You are trying to find a STUPID iq test to TRICK your FRIENDS about the INFINITE? If you find an iq test that can do that, it won't be very stupid, now, will it?
   • "f*ck e math"-This guy has a grudge against the base of the NAPERIAN LOGARITHMS.
   • "f*ck sine"-The SINE trigonometric function is haunting this dude. I bet he doesn't like COSINE, either.
   • "porno sine Greece"-In case you are wondering, that's a famous mathematics function. Others are the PORNO COSINE and the PORNO TANGENT functions.
   • "hw#3 find the sequence with each of these functions as its exponential generating function. f(x)=3x^..."-This ingenious college student tries to stuff the ENTIRE homework problem into the search engine. That's a "D" for this IDIOT!
   • "analyse graph of y=x^n^x"-You get a "D" for not knowing how to SPELL, and your teacher gets an "F" for giving you such a problem.
   • "where do greece get their food"-We ORDER it from the restaurant at the end of the universe.
   • "most intelligent duck"-the scientists are RESEARCHING this, as we speak. Be patient.
   • "greatness of hitler"-A little faulty logic here, fellas. Nothing to see, really. Move along, move along...
   • "complex exponential effect of real"-That's a NEW research AREA in Math, ain't it?
   • "maple function for ackermann"-Non-primitive recursive functions which grow hyperexponentially CANNOT be built in, cause they would cause overflows even for very small arguments, genius.
   • "hitler's fatal mistake"-His fatal mistake was BEING BORN.
   • "f*ck mathematics"-ANOTHER poor student having TROUBLE with Calculus.
   • "series expansion of log(x)"-Another DESPERATE math student who can't read his/her Calculus book.
   • "e^x expansion"- This one's looking for the simplest series expansion there is. You can tell that whoever it is, they either don't understand their Calculus book or they haven't opened it yet.
   • "5^2 series expansion"-Holy Cow...
   • "series expansion (x-1)"-I better not comment on this...
   • "series expansion table"-For WHICH series, dork?
   • "n! series expansion"-GULP! I'm gonna CHOKE!
   • "proof series n!/n^n"-YIKES!
   • "series expansion ^-n"-This one's CREATIVE. Hopes to find a series for SOMETHING raised to (-n). I say it's STILL a "D" for him in math class.
   • "Temporarily disable antivirus program"-Now, THERE's a real power user.
   • "a building that is well known in greece"-The PARTHENON dummy. It's been SITTING here for almost 3,000 years. Didn't you go to SCHOOL?
   • "math plot 1/f"-Oh, that's a good one! Let's see if we can find plot pictures of 1/f for an ARBITRARY f. Well, it's HIS dad paying for college, not mine...
   • "expansion of sqrt(2)"-Another math genius doing his research. Here's a clue, sport: It's INFINITE, so you won't find it anywhere on the net.
   • "1/e calculate"-This one doesn't know how to calculate an approximation for the inverse of a number. Wonder why he asks...
   • "c code exponents"-THERE's your average programming GENIUS, as well. Here's a hint chief: There are READY MADE MATH LIBRARIES for this stuff.
   • "value of lambda mm"-Oh, that's a PHYSICS student, alright, not knowing how to convert between nm and mm. YOU GET A "D", buddy.
   • "you know your greek when"-"You know YOU'RE greek when", bozo. Do you know how to use your OWN language? Sheesh...
   • "mosquitos athens"-he's probably right to be curious. The mosquitos in the States can kill an elephant.
   • "programming scanner"-What KIND of scanner, perfesser? Virus scanner or image scanner?
   • "solving second equation"-This math prodigy has all equations nicely classified: Shame on you for not knowing the SECOND equation.
   • "tele-transport meaning"-Check with LaForge, down in engineering.
   • "what time greece today"-This guy's forte is RELATIVITY. I bet he's teaching Tensor Analysis at some school.
   • "tell me what the population is in greece today"-NO. How's that for an answer?
   • "how religion is in greece today"-It is very WELL, thank you!
   • "where is greece today?"-It's on the same location it was 3,000 years ago, genius.
   • "solving for n points on a circle"-Of course. How could I ever miss this incredible solution method?
   • "the creation of bubble-gum and making some yourself"-Now THERE's a guy who's found a good pastime. Here's a HINT fella: You can buy TONS of it in a supermarket, CHEAP.
   • "which bubble gum blows the biggest bubble/ science fair project"-What happened to citrus-powered light-bulbs? Biology and gardening projects? Solar/light-powered fans? There are thousands of projects to pick from and you chose to investigate BUBBLE-GUM? What a MORON!
   • "show me science fair projects on bubblegum"-There we go, AGAIN.
   • "worrying is like solving an algebra equation with chewing gum"-That's RIGHT. That's why the previous fellas are REALLY interested in bubble-gum science projects. The bigger the bubble, the faster the equation is solved.
   • "science fair project watermelon lamp"-This would get you an "F" just for mentioning it in Physics class.
   • "noah's ark science fair projects"-Build the ark and get IN THERE, QUICK. We'll take care of the rest for you.
   • "alpha centauri clock speed"-This one's probably planning a trip there. Tell us ALL about it when you come back, friend.
   • "toy crane machine secrets"-Uh, huh. Tell us all about it now. Use your OWN words. We'll keep notes and we promise not to lock you up prematurely.
   • "toy schematics"-For WHICH toy, Einstein?
   • "email instructions"-Another computer savvy user. Let's all give him a helping hand.
   • "virtual engine instrument for engine"-If this guy succeeds in finding whatever he's looking for, he will surely be able to fly. At least.
   • "how to proof this equation r=??/a"-This one's creative: Check the use of the wildcard characters. YOU GET AN "F", BOZO!
   • "uranium refine diagram"-Uh, oh. Somebody's looking for trouble...
   • "how the f*ck do you measure atomic radii"-It's a DIFFICULT job, but SOMEBODY's got to do it.
   • "will time machines come?"-Of course they will. Time machines can have ORGASMS, too!
   • "kid in spaceship goes forward in time"-We have a young TIMELORD here, folks! Let's all wish the kid, GOOD LUCK on his JOURNEY!
   • "reach for the stars ladder"-Why don't you build one yourself, dude?
   • "how to make a time machines"-Now, THERE's your average young EINSTEIN, trying to build his science project.
   • "mathematics as a function of the brain"-Is it? That's news to me. I always thought of Mathematics as a function of my right foot.
   • "skin burns from xenon light"-We have a DARWIN AWARD candidate here, folks! Operating an unprotected Xenon lamp and getting skin burns, you are VERY LUCKY the Xenon bulb (which operates at > 90 atmospheres) didn't EXPLODE, which would leave you with melting hot quartz pieces flying all around you.
   • "color temperature of black light"-Black light DOESN'T HAVE a color temperature, Edison, because it's plain INVISIBLE ultraviolet radiation.
   • "handheld wavelength"-Wavelength that's HANDHELD, eh? YOU GET A "D" IN PHYSICS CLASS, MORON!!
   • "color spectrum for blacklight"-Have you ever wondered why blacklight is called "BLACK" light? Perhaps because it's INVISIBLE ultraviolet radiation? Does ultraviolet radiation have a "color"? THAT'S AN "F" FOR YOU, Einstein.
   • "black light luminance"-Here we go AGAIN.
   • "handheld full spectrum black light"-This guy is looking for a "full-spectrum" blacklight lamp. Nevermind the fact that blacklight is INVISIBLE UV radiation. So let's all wish him GOOD LUCK in finding such a lamp.
   • "how many spectroscope are there"-Billions and billions!
   • "export out of greece"-YES, that's right. Things are exported 'out of'. I have yet to see things exported 'in' a country.
   • "calculating the sin"-Better check with your local parish. They'll tell you EXACTLY how much it is in your case.
   • "2 exponent 3, using c"-It equals 8, genius. No need for C code to calculate it. YOU GET AN "F" in programming class!
   • "show that a real, even function of x(t) real and even"-You want to show that a REAL, EVEN function is REAL and EVEN? Hmmm...Hard question. Better check with sci.math.
   • "photography using angles"-ALRIGHTY...Don't forget your COMPASS, now, you hear?
   • "baby lab monkeys"- I smell EVIL and DEMENTED scientists in the air...
   • "does mosquitos sleep"-Does being illiterates is funny? Yes, it does.
   • "the role of the horse in ancient greece"-Um, I THINK horses were used as aides to philosophers and housewives, back then. Pretty useful animal, the horse.
   • "make virtual human download"-To download a virtual human off the net, you'd need a VERY fast line, dude!
   • "what special characteristics did the homo habilis have that helped them to survive"-they MASTURBATED a lot.
   • "genius math illusion"-YES. It's an ILLUSION if you THINK you are a math genius. You are RIGHT about THAT.
   • "biological designs for logos"-Somebody's trying to clone Jesus. Or something like that...
   • "biological codes for the christ race"-What am I telling ya? The latest fad is Jesus cloning.
   • "free spider from cocoon"-YEAP. Free the poor spider from its OWN cocoon. The spider went WHACKO and cocooned itself.
   • "how did my spider visit web page every hour"-Somebody isn't very happy with web-spider programs visiting his web pages. HEY, consider it an increase of your popularity.
   • "eye of pupil"-It's EYE PUPIL moron. Eye of pupil is the eye of a student.
   • "child time machines"-This one wants a CHILD time machine. An ADULT time machine won't do.
   • "starting salaries in greece"-VERY low, unless you have a nice ass or pussy.
   • "$00000015"-That's a REALLY bad POINTER you've got there, buddy. Press RESET, quick.
   • "increasing exponential equation"-An equation that's INCREASING? YOU GET A "D" in Math class, moron!
   • "johann heinrich lambert function"-That's RIGHT folks! Lambert's mother gave birth to a FUNCTION. She named it Johann Heinrich Lambert.
   • "devil function"-It's the function the DEVIL uses! Otherwise known as the COERCION function. Be VEWY VEWY CAREFUL!
   • "possible endings for the universe"-NEVER MIND about the universe. Worry about YOUR ending, which will come BEFORE the universe's.
   • "math: suspicious points"-I always suspected certain points as SUSPICIOUS in math, myself. Better call 911 and report them.
   • "i have 4 points and i need the equation plot"-I have a much harder problem: I have 6 billion morons and I NEED a 100 terraton H-bomb to clean this planet up!
   • "dying bacteria strange feeling"-I didn't KNOW bacteria could express their FEELINGS!
   • "a code for heuristic virus scan"-Why don't you start SIMPLE, learning first how to identify a virus using a SIGNATURE and THEN worry about HEURISTICS?
   • "auxiliary math proof"-YEAP, there are two proofs for every math problem: The direct one, for normal students and the AUXILIARY one, for IDIOTS.
   • "hg-lamp contains mercury"-By JOVE! This guy figured it all out! Perhaps that's why it's called a 'hg-lamp'.
   • "mucury spectrum"-The unknown, new element, is mucury, everyone. Start your research!
   • "function of spectacles"-How OLD are you sport? 6? Even 6-year-olds KNOW what spectacles ARE.
   • "plain glass eyeglasses"-That's RIGHT. These are the glasses actors wear in movies to make themselves look like they are wearing true glasses. Pretty USEFUL stuff.
   • "difference real jewels from fake ones"-Contemplating your future job? Better know your stuff before you try to steal the Star of Africa, eh?
   • "house in middle of the M62"-There is a house in the MIDDLE of Messier object 62? By Jove, how come Hubble hasn't IMAGED it, yet? Who goes there?
   • "odd continuation of the function"-An odd continuation of the function would be very...odd, indeed.
   • "superstition tricks to do with your friends - make them feel like there floating when there not"-I think you better learn to spell FIRST, and THEN try to become David Coperfield.
   • "illusions that makes you fall asleep"-ANOTHER David Coperfield fan, wannabe hypnotist. It's a popular job, nowadays...
   • "david coperfield spectacle photos"-This guy just wants to see Coperfield's SPECTACLES. Talk about strange FETISHES.
   • "david coperfield official shite"-This guy wants Coperfield's official SHITE. Let's GIVE IT to him.
   • "pi numerically defined"-Alrighty.Got some PAPER? Get ready so I can dictate infinitely many decimal digits to you.
   • "what animal's fingerprints are identical as human's fingerprints"-This fella's heard somewhere that primates have fingerprints, so now he is trying to locate the source of the fact, preferably finding animals with IDENTICAL fingerprints to humans. WOOOHOOO!!
3. Art, Music, MIDI, Composers, Pianists, Painters!!
   • "was richard wagner's music God glorifying?"-Of COURSE it was. Particularly in the domain of anti-semitism. The NAZIs REALLY liked Wagner's music. MORE than Bach's.
   • "back fugue aiff"-It's the famous BACK fugue. It was written BACKWARDS.
   • "fugues are boring"-That's because you are a MUSICALLY-ILLITERATE MORON.
   • "Why did Bach write lute prelude 999"-Why indeed. I think he had a bad day and decided to write something to torture future aspiring guitarists.
   • "study bach: there you will find brahms"-That's right. Then, study Brahms and your will find Schubert. Then, study Schubert and you will find John Lennon. It's a big cycle.
   • "Can bach music give you nightmares?"-If Bach's music can give you nightmares, then rock music will kill ya, dude.
   • "harpsichord registration"-This dude got a harpsichord as a Christmas present. Now he wants to register it online. Let's give him a hand, shall we?
   • "which is the hardest prelude and fuge"-The one you cannot play, Mozart.
   • "four voice download"-Let's all help this fella download FOUR VOICES from the net...
   • "bach English suit explain"-What's there to explain? Bach liked English suits and was wearing them ALL THE TIME.
   • "sibelius music cunt whatever"-This student is not very HAPPY with his music assignment.
   • "composing without instrument"-Now THERE's your average Beethoven, wannabe!.
   • "bach fugue generator"-This guy is looking for an automatic BACH-fugue generator. Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK in finding one.
   • "why did the famous Johann Sebastian Bach die?"-WHY, indeed. Perhaps because ALL HUMANS die eventually? WHY did you have to die Johann?
   • "Bach's insanity"-YES, Bach was completely NUTS! He managed to write 1080 incredible musical works and he had 21 kids, but his INSANITY finally got him. f*cking LUNATIC! I wish I was as INSANE as he was!
   • "how to write a canon Bach style"-Atta boy, Johann! you can DO it! You REALLY can!
   • "johann sebastian bach hot wife pics"-WHICH wife, friend? Maria Barbara or Anna Magdalena? Tell us, so we can help you locate some hot pics from 1706-1720.
   • "easy music may the force be with you note"-Yes, Luke. Use THE MUSIC Luke to blow up Death Star. May the note BE with you, Luke.
   • "bach jesus mp3 classical guitar"-Looking for mp3 classical guitar pieces by the composer 'bach-jesus'.
   • "smf0 to midi converters"-This guy's looking for a converter that converts between two formats that are the same. HELLO? smf0 IS the standard midi format.
   • "ludwig van beethoven- favorite fruit"-You don't know Beethoven's favorite fruit? SHAME on you! It was the kiwi, dummy. It helped with his CONSTIPATION problems.
   • "beethoven spacecraft"-It's A BIRD! It's A PLANE! NO, it's...BEETHOVEN's SPACECRAFT! WATCH OUT!
   • "music analysis and beethoven's partita"-Beethoven didn't write any PARTITAS, Sibelius. Bach did.
   • "vienna fruit music midi instrument made out of fruit"-What the f*ck?!
   • "bach musician"-Yes, sport. When YOU can write an Oratorio which includes 20 50-voice fugues in it, as well, you'd be a 'musician', too!
   • "gould bach bad"-Gould's playing was 'bad', eh? Why don't YOU play some Bach for us, instead, and show us how he SHOULD be played, Beethoven?
   • "most complex fugues"-Why, did you already MASTER the EASY ones, Glenn?
   • "glenn gould pianist third hand"-Yes. Unbeknownst to most musicologists Glenn Gould had a HIDDEN THIRD HAND which he used when he played Bach. Unfortunately nobody ever saw it.
   • "I have an idea for a painting"-GOOD for YOU, but don't quit your DAY JOB, yet, DaVinci.
   • "lyrics to sons of god"-YEAH, lets sing them together. I'll accompany you on the piano...
   • "greensleaves musical mechanism"- Somebody is VERY impressed with their music box which plays Greensleaves when wound up.
   • "painting techniqe's"-Another illiterate bozo, wannabe painter. Learn your language FIRST, try to paint AFTERWARDS.
   • "back invention 14"-This fella likes classical music. Johann Sebastian BACK, in particular.
   • "music programs that has no virus"-Uh, oh! SOMEBODY has been infected with viruses at least once. Somebody illiterate...
   • "piano orgasm"-OKAY...
   • "piano disaster"-Another piano student who MESSED UP his exam. GOOD LUCK NEXT TIME, Mozart!
   • "what is a quarter piano?"-It's a piano broken in four with an ax by the student above, after he's failed his piano final.
   • "we shall overcome midi file"-We MOST CERTAINLY shall. MusicXML is out, ALREADY!
   • "Getting away without registering Sibelius"-90% of the population is using illegal Windows programs, so this guy is right to be AFRAID!
   • "twelve foot steinway"-Yeah, DREAM ON!
   • "prelude ii wtc not that hard"-Oh YEAH? Let's hear YOU play it.
   • "music is immortal"-You don't SAY! What other bits of wisdom do you have for us?
   • "note worthy composer for mac"-A HA, HA! Keep DREAMING, dude!
   • "i want to listen to bach"-So WHO's stopping you?
   • "I want to hear bach music"-Good for you! Did you know there are certain circular devices called CD's, containing his music?
   • "how should one interpret piano music"-Now THERE's your average Glenn Gould wannabe.
   • "johann sebastian bach music you can listen"-This guy is SMART! Did you know there's some of his music you are not SUPPOSED to listen?
   • "what kind music can be played in the bars?"-Now THERE's your average budding disk jockey, contemplating his future job!
   • "cow sounds mid format"-Let's all give this fella a hand to build his twenty-first century symphony orchestra with cows! MOOOOOoooooo!!
4. Philosophy, Religion, Faith, Metaphysics, Demons, Priests, Mythology, The Meaning of Life!!
   • "according to christianity is it sin to see blue films"-Yes. CHRISTIANITY has determined that its followers should see only RED films. Seeing BLUE films is a SIN, punishable by the Devil himself.
   • "who am I because of CHRISTS sacrifice for me"-You are the clown BOZO. Christ's SACRIFICE has determined that you are BOZO the CLOWN.
   • "the Universal Minds Wisdom Speaks through me"-Let's prepare the STRAIGHT-JACKET for this guy, before he starts a new religion.
   • "trigger God in our dna"-Let's all TRIGGER GOD, in our DNA. After we do, let's FIND him and give him the WORKS! WooHoo!
   • "god genes decoded proves that humans need to worship"-God is DEAD. God gene decoded proves that you need to be eliminated from the gene-pool, because you are STUPID.
   • "i am the only consciousness"-Another unsuspecting victim of solipsism. Me too!.
   • "who believes in instantaneous resurrection"-Who indeed. Cause when your time comes, you'll try to remember ALL and ANY available theories about the afterlife.
   • "ways to clear bad karma from your life and home"-It's HARD dude. Alternatively, if you are too stupid to do the work, read this. Everyone has a chance.
   • "god's dna revealed"-That's right. And I have it. You can buy samples for $30,000.
   • "stupidity is immortal"-Only if you have kids. Why don't you help the world, the universe and everyone else, by taking an indefinite vow of celibacy if you don't have children or KILL them if you do?
   • "and i played chesss with the death"-No you didn't, you f*cking moron. If you did, you'd be DEAD.
   • "pictures of people rejected by god"-Go to the About section of this web site, genius.
   • "do this in remembrance of me-A sobering request"-Jesus during the last supper left a sobering request to all those attending. f*cking drunkards that they were...
   • "God decided a long time ago who believes in him and who does not"-That's right. He threw the dice.
   • "is sensuality the tree of the knowledge of good and evil"-Yes. Eve wore a sensual negligee and sexy garter-belts. Adam went blind from excitement and by mistake ate from the tree.
   • "did christ use cannabis?"-Christ IS Cannabis, dOOfus.
   • "according to karma why people become blind"-Yeap. Bad Karma causes blindness. Be careful!.
   • "in hell burning on a marijuana trip"-Relax, dude. It was just a bad trip. No big deal. Here is some assistance just in case you try again.
   • "is there people that feels rejected by god"-Yes, there is. You don't want to know more, believe me.
   • "The Most Secret of All Oranizations"-Quick. Anybody know any secret oranizations?
   • "holy spirit manifestation dog barking in distance"-That's right. The Holy Spirit manifests directly ONLY when a dog barks in a distance.
   • "how do the gods of greece become immortal"-That's how. Live, Learn, Evolve, and when your stupidity decreases sufficiently one day, death may spare you.
   • "what the f*ck is the gnostic serpents motivation for telling informing adam and eve"-This dude has a grudge against the mythical 'gnostic serpent'. Watch out.
   • "the knoledge of good and evil"-I think you should learn how to SPELL "knowledge" FIRST, BEFORE trying to find out about it, dude.
   • "luciferian witchcraft he f*cked my wife"-Somebody HELP this guy. His wife got f*cked by a Luciferian warlock...
   • "the life span of the greek monster the hydra"-It was EXACTLY 42 years. The Hydra lived for 42 years.
   • "things that immerse and occupied our mind"-Don't worry about that. STUPIDITY and ILLITERACY naturally protect you from such endeavors.
   • "how does activating god's word affect our future"-It fills our future with MORONS. THAT's how it affects it.
   • "if love is not immortal then how is it able to survive time?"-I think you are confusing LOVE and LUST, buddy.
   • "are nephilim alive today?"-I think this fella needs more BIBLE lessons to figure it out. He is STILL confused.
   • "what is the relationship between gabriel, michael and lucifer?"-They were BROTHERS, but one of them was NAUGHTY and decided to found his own RELIGION.
   • "who was born first adam and eve or australopithecus afarensis"-Another confused BIBLE student.
   • "australopithecus satan"-That's RIGHT. Australopithecus was SATAN INCARNATE.
   • "it's not the destination that counts it's the voyage"-I say, f*ck BOTH the destination AND the voyage. How about THAT?!
   • "kabbalah adversary"-YES! HE's the one who makes you perform stupid searches like this one. You can't fight him, so you might as well forget all about him.
   • "define pneuma"-Uh, don't know. Maybe that which BLOWS?
   • "cannabis jehovah"-Got THAT right. If you want good relations with JEHOVAH, stay away from it.
   • "was JHVH a tyrant?"-If you've read the OLD TESTAMENT and STILL cannot tell, seems to me your natural stupidity PROTECTS you WELL from this book. CONGRATULATIONS!
   • "real ghost images"-This guy's looking for REAL ghost images. Not FAKE or IMAGINARY ones, please. Only the BEST will do in his search.
   • "religion cures paranoia"-Sure does. Particularly in view of the fact that ANY religion is always another form of paranoia, ITSELF.
   • "everything is an illusion religion"-You don't need it to be a RELIGION, buddy. It's TRUE! Now blow your brains out, to end the illusion and spare us having to deal with one more IDIOT.
   • "scientific reason why we cannot stay alive forever"-"LIFE: Nature's way of keeping meat FRESH" -- Doctor Who
   • "how to apply christ's sacrifice to lives"-If you HAVE to ask, you've been REJECTED ALREADY, genius.
   • "reasons and effects of sacrifice"-Reasons: STUPIDITY. Effects: NONE. Next question?
   • "daemon university of athens greece"-That's RIGHT. That's where I graduated FROM.
   • "does daemon have sex?"-No, buddy. Daemons have more IMPORTANT things to do, like possess people and make them IDIOTS. Just like YOU.
   • "did jesus christ do a bad karma"-This guy doesn't know who jesus christ WAS and what he DID. He doesn't know grammar EITHER, so it figures.
   • "karma commands"-Here's ONE: 'In the name of JESUS, I command THEE, unclean spirit to exit this IDIO^C^C, ahem, man'.
   • "greek mythology words that is now use today"-Jesus Christ. I am gonna VOMIT.
   • "who was the gospel john writing for"-It was for the illiterates. Like YOURSELF.
   • "gospel of john pain"-That's RIGHT. Take a look for yourself.
   • "the name of jesus does not drive out demons"-The name of Jesus is fine. It's your FAITH that's short. Best of luck NEXT TIME, Abraham.
   • "you know, the ancient greeks movie"-This guy is TALKING to the search engine! Comon, let's all give him a helping hand, shall we?
   • "greek god morpheus hobbies"-Um, his main hobby was mountaintop climbing. His other hobby was making people dream. Which one are you interested in?
   • "define something undefined"-Okay. Would you like it to be SLIGHTLY undefined, MORE undefined or COMPLETELY undefined? If you answer this question then I'll give you your answer.
   • "why dualism makes sense"-You've got that BACKWARDS. It's BECAUSE of dualism that NOTHING makes sense.
   • "is our society dualist or not?"-Stare HARD at your question, dude!
   • "solomon's daemons"-We CRAVE power, don't we? That AIN'T the way to do it, believe me.
   • "what the scriptures say about business enterprise"-This business student is VERY confused.
   • "priests in black gowns"-CHECK IT OUT! Carpenter's new FILM!
   • "obscure priests"-Google for DISCORDIANISM, dude.
   • "what would a modern priest wear?"-A negligee?.
   • "priests what they wear?"-Here we go again.
   • "what are the boots that priests wear"-They are SPECIAL boots, to kick YOUR ASS if you don't go to Sunday service. WATCH IT!
   • "why priests where black"-Because THERE black!
   • "why can't people wear black and priests can?"-BE VERY CAREFUL! You can spend AT LEAST 10 days in jail if the authorities catch you wearing black and you are not a priest!
   • "can i wear an orthodox cassock?"-Beware that orthodox priest impersonation is PUNISHABLE BY LAW!
   • "picture of what do priests wear"-I think I'll open a STORE selling black clothing. You never know. All those people asking these questions may turn to be good CUSTOMERS.
   • "some priests don't wear pants when they wear the cassock"-How do you KNOW? Did you take a PEAK under the cassock while the priest was BLESSING you?
   • "thing priests wear"-What's with the f*cking PRIEST obsession? Leave them alone! They have a JOB to do!
   • "do our choices determine our destiny?"-No. Our destiny is determined by LITTLE GREEN MEN with big ears on planet Vulcan.
   • "control your subconscious"-Oh YEAH? Easy for YOU to say. Have YOU tried it, sport?
   • "subconscious cleaner -vacuum -creditcard"-This guy wants to find out how to CLEAR his subconscious WITHOUT using a vacuum cleaner and WITHOUT paying with his credit card. Well, I've got news for you buddy: Can't be done WITHOUT using BOTH of them: A vacuum cleaner and a credit card. Bummer!
   • "fear frucissier"-Will do. Any OTHER demons we should FEAR?
   • "daemon names"-Thinking of SUMMONING a couple? Good luck!
   • "how can i get the power of clauneck"-Inquiring minds want to KNOW, how to SUMMON a specific demon. Another DARWIN AWARD candidate.
   • "Gender of Frucissiere"-This ingenious person want to know the 'gender' of a demon. YooHoo! Demons have no gender, you genius, you. They can f*ck you in all sorts of ways, Abraham.
   • "how do you summon a evil and painful curse on someone that will make them feel pain until i want it to stop"-Uh oh. There's something REALLY wrong with this girl. She has ISSUES to settle.
   • "manifestation of the sons of god"-Here's a clue, sport: go look in the mirror.
   • "how to humble oneself"-Well, if you HAVE to ask, you probably can't do it...
   • "paranoia of the woods"-We have a BLAIR WITCH fan here, folks.
   • "is all existence a mere illusion of reality"-Besides the fact that the phrase doesn't parse to begin with, even if you cut off the last two words, if YOU can't tell, your place is in a LOONY BIN, fella.
   • "not being able to differentiate between dreams and reality"-Another MENTAL HOSPITAL PATIENT.
   • "smart mythical god"-Well, if he was smart, he'd still have followers, wouldn't he?.
   • "actual blair witch"-This fella was so impressed with the movie, he wants to SEE the witch.
   • "daemon consultant"-This guy sure has found his PURPOSE in life. Good luck in your endeavors, fella. This job pays well.
   • "demons attacking chicago"-YEAP. Those pesky demons have an affinity for large cities. WATCH OUT now, dude. They come from up high, SUDDENLY.
   • "where would I find a reference in the bible to our memory being wiped out"-You won't find it in the Bible. You'll find it in your nearest hospital records, where all recent lobotomies are archived chronologically.
   • "how many biological sons did god have"-JESUS CHRIST! What kind of question is THAT?
   • "is there immortality?"-Tell you what, dude: Ride a large motorbike and accelerate to 200kms/h. Pick a pole and crash on it head on. If you survive, tell us all about it.
   • "Noah's ark arafat"-YEAP, that's where Noah's ark landed, after the Biblical flood, alright: On Arafat's head. That's why the Jews don't like the guy.
   • "god mating"-YEAH, he does, occasionally. WATCH OUT when he has an orgasm, tho. It can cause a big bang.
   • "is there such a thing as the smell of death approaching?"-YES, WATCH OUT, fella. It usually comes from the left side.
   • "fake ghost manifestation"-Better watch out for the fake ones. GOOD ghost manifestations are ALWAYS real.
   • "how long will it take for my cat to reincarnate?"-Well, you've GOT to calculate WHAT it will reincarnate INTO, then multiply THAT by e^x and integrate with respect to x, from a to b, where a is your birth date and b is your cat's birthday, both converted to milliseconds. The answer you'll get will be the time between now and when your cat reincarnates.
   • "life has no meaning"-WOW! Took you a WHILE to FIGURE IT OUT, eh? Now GIVE IT a meaning, unless you wanna STAY bored for the rest of your life.
   • "so... does life have a meaning, a purpose, a f*cking something??"-See answer below.
   • "meaning you give it meaning of life"-Yes, sport. That's right. Life has the meaning YOU give it.
   • "no significance no meaning"-You are GETTING there, sport! You REALLY are!
   • "messiah schizophrenia"- Got THAT right. May I interest you in a new religion?
   • "latin daemons"-I don't know about LATIN ones, but I know of some GREEK ones. Are you interested?
   • "is faith a form of knowledge"-YES! I have faith that there exists a PINK UNICORN on Alpha Centauri. What about YOU?
   • "what's the f*cking difference"-You've GUESSED IT. NONE.
   • "the mind is a fraud"-It's WORSE than that, sport. EVERYTHING is a fraud. BRACE yourself.
   • "nature is a whore"-You DON'T SAY! Figured it out, finally, you clever thinker, you...
   • "non-dualism vs dualism"-That's STILL dualism, dude!
   • "soul energy sources"-ENERGIZER batteries. They keep on going and going and going....
   • "soul's link to the body"-You can locate it using a GUN. Write me privately and I'll tell you what to do.
   • "greek mythology Methuselah"-This poor Bible student is trying to historically locate a mythological Jewish figure in ANOTHER nation's mythology. You get an "F" in Bible studies, dude.
   • "what happens before you die"-NEVER MIND about that. Worry about what happens AFTER you die.
   • "if I die it would be as if I never existed"-IF, and WHEN you die, you WON'T CARE about this shit, smartypants.
   • "the best way to fight magus"-We have a LORD OF THE RINGS aficionado here, folks. Let's all give him a HELPING HAND.
   • "when you reincarnate when do you enter a new life"-Exactly at the point when the hairy husband starts to SNORE, after turning on the other side.
   • "reincarnation is f*cking stupid"-We'll be hearing your opinion again, when you are going to be shitting your pants, on your deathbed.
   • "reincarnation is fun"-We'll be hearing your opinion again, when you are going to be shitting your pants, on your deathbed.
   • 
     Original Image Source: imgflip meme generator
5. Matrix!
   • "why is the matrix the movie an allegory"-This dude has lots of homework to do, yet.
   • "the matrix neo as devil"-Another mentally challenged internet user.
   • "agent smith is jesus christ"-Almost. You are almost there. Keep trying dude.
   • "in the matrix the oracle is the devil"-There we go again. Can anyone get the f*cking thing RIGHT? Sweet Jesus, help us.
   • "If neo represents god/jesus what does agent smith represent?"-Barnabas. Agent Smith represents BARNABAS. Now let's have it OVER with.
   • "use bible matrix code online"-In case you didn't know: Bible code = Matrix code.
   • "i eat red pill is reading bible"-Got that backwards. When you read the Bible, it's like taking the blue pill.
   • "zionist messages behind matrix"-Messages from the CITY of Zion in the movie or zionist messages in the matrix ALLEGORY? Make up your mind, dude.
   • "the message behind the matrix"-The message behind the matrix is that you've been REJECTED, genius. Deal with it.
   • "similar symbolism between The Matrix and The Allegory"-Similar symbolism between a film and the allegory it induces. Uh huh.
   • "red pill-blue pill"-This guy STILL has problems with the original Matrix movie. HELLO!? We are on the THIRD sequel already...
   • "you take the red pill, you take the blue pill"-Doesn't matter which one you take bozo. You'd STILL be in HELL...
   • "LARGE red pill"-Yes. A HUGE one. Neo swallowed a red HORSE pill. He almost choked.
   • "neo swallows"-Yes, we've already ESTABLISHED that. He swallows the f*ckING RED PILL. Get over it ALREADY.
   • "what happens when neo takes the red pill"-Here we go again... YAAAAAAAAWWWWWN.
   • "what happens if you take the blue AND the red pill"-TOGETHER? That's easy: You go INSANE.
   • "how come smith died when neo died in matrix three"-It's a MOVIE, sport. ANYTHING can happen in a MOVIE.
   • "truman show grand architect"-Either this guy is VERY confused about who the architect was, or he's looking for Ed Harris.
   • "morpheus hand blue pills"-YES, Morpheus, hand the DAMN PILLS and let's have it over with, because there are TOO MANY stupid entries in this category.
   • "illuminati conspiracy take the red pill"-We have a SCENARIO CHANGE, fellas! Now matrix is a conspiracy by the Illuminati! Somebody WAKE this guy up, QUICK!.
   • "why do they want to dismantle the matrix"-Because it's ALREADY 7 years old?
   • "neo died in 3rd movie"-What are you gonna DO about it, sport?
6. Sociology, Politics, Lawyers, Human Relations, Sports, Boyfriends, Girlfriends, Advertising!!
   • "why are woman so vicious?"-Probably because 'woman' have SOMETHING we all want? A PUSSY for example?
   • "how do greeks get around their country today?"-We use CARRIAGES with HORSES and DONKEYS of course, because Greek women LOVE animals.
   • "how you know when you'are in a greek house"-If, when you leave your ASSHOLE is three inches WIDER, THAT's how you'll know.
   • "want and cannot have"-Welcome to the club of LOSERS. In case you haven't figured it out ALREADY, the answer is MONEY.
   • "if your mother is greek are you greek?"-What do YOU think, genius?
   • "what phrases to use when somebody has a birthday"-SURPRISE them! Use CONDOLENCE phrases.
   • "phrases for finding a boyfriend"-With such search phrases, you are LOSING boyfriends, honey.
   • "phrases which will swear at an x boyfriend"-How about: 'Your brain is even smaller than your dick!'.
   • "intelligent words for moron idiot"-I bet this fella doesn't KNOW what a contradiction is, EITHER.
   • "girlfriend spends too much time with her mother"-And that BOTHERS you? It's her MOTHER sport. Mothers are the HOLIEST thing after yourself. Give her a break.
   • "phrases to tell your x girlfriend"-How about: 'A good masturbation session was better than the way you made sex, anyway'.
   • "remote control filthy phrases swear machine"-It looks just like a REGULAR tv remote control. You push the buttons and your 'swear machine' swears AT YOU.
   • "'f*ck you' in ape sign language"-Apparently some zoo APE is giving its trainer unexpected trouble.
   • "lawyer stupid human why i not"-Somebody who's been HAD by LAWYERS?
   • "logistic logos"-I LIKE IT! That's like saying "measurable measure".
   • "jealous about boyfriend fantasizing"-Fantasizing about WHAT? It REALLY makes a difference, you know, lady.
   • "should i be jealous if my boyfriend gets an erection looking at pictures of women?"-No, you shouldn't be. Because this means you are a LOUSY f*ck, yourself.
   • "is kissing too emotional for men if they don't want to fall in love?"-Just SCREW the guy and NEVER MIND that. He's going to deal with it later.
   • "yesterday I dreamt about my lover"-You DON'T SAY! ZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz.
   • "dreamt of you my love"-AWWWWWWWW! Ain't that SWEET?
   • "how to impress my lover when she is refusing"-Just show her your 20 inch SCHLONG!
   • "more money"-AHA! You've got the RIGHT IDEA, though the net won't tell you anything you don't already KNOW.
   • "f*ck greece / f*ck greeks"- Venting some steam via the search engine, eh? Here's a little something for you: f*ck YOU, TOO!
   • "greece today / what life is like in greece today"-We screw girls all day long in the beaches and on the isles. Eat your heart out.
   • "how do people spend a day in greece"-Ah! We spend the whole day on the beach and the night at the bars drinkin booze and chasing women. All year round.
   • "sign language-curse words"-The correct syntax of this dictates "sign language words", but no "curse". I think he's rather looking for curse words IN sign language, which is even more amusing. Maybe he has a score to settle with a dumb man. You SHOW THEM, dude! Give them the FINGER, which is universal.
   • "vulcan language phrase curses"-Somebody HELP this guy. He has a score to settle with SPOCK.
   • "malaka greek"-Somebody told this guy what he is and he is desperately trying to find out what it means. Here's a HINT guy: You are a MASTURBATOR.
   • "phrase to know before going to greece"-'MALAKA'. See above. It will be your PRIMARY NICKNAME while you are here.
   • "stupid phrases"-Your wish is granted. Look around.
   • "FREE stupid phrases"-Fortunately for you, stupidity is FREE, all year round, and so are the phrases here.
   • "baseball bats"-WOW! What an interesting topic. Tell us all about it, now. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....
   • "shoe for man"-Let's not really make fun of this guy. He is probably a one-legged cripple looking for shoes on the net.
   • "phrases about sons"-Here's one: f*ck YOU, daddio.
   • "what is a legal system"-Now THERE's your average wannabe lawyer genius. Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK.
   • "how can fraud be detected?"- No need to detect it. You can ASSUME for all practical purposes that EVERYONE and EVERYTHING is fraudulent in this world.
   • "fraud"-In GENERAL? I assure you, you'll find out about it pretty soon, living in this world.
   • "what does anon mean"-It's from "a" and the FRENCH "non" meaning "NO". "A NO".GET IT?
   • "who was anon"-A great philosopher of the past. Born 1684, died 1738. His motto was 'the more invisible you are, the more efficient you can be'.
   • "familiarity breeds contempt"-That's RIGHT. That's why you should make sure to change sexual partners often. Just some friendly advice...
   • "stolen license plates"-Contemplating your future career, eh?
   • "bush filthy piece of shit"-Someone doesn't agree with Dubya's policies, I suppose...
   • "what effect have people from greece had on the world, foodwise"-Have you heard of SOUVLAKI?
   • "sign language picture f*ck you curse"-EASY NOW, fella! Take a deep breath. RELAX and we can talk about it.
   • "names of the smurfs"-This fella's contemplating opening a kindergarten.
7. Medicine, Doctors, Diseases, Insanity, Dementia, Schizophrenia, Paranoia, Desperation!
   • "why in the f*ck you are attacking against me again"-Paranoid internet user thinks that someone is attacking against him again. Seeks information about the attack on the search engine.
   • "cancerious sole"-The guy has a "cancerious" sole. His foot-sole grew to COLOSSAL dimensions and he cannot walk.
   • "WHAT'S THE BEST THING FOR HIDRADENITIS"-Suicide. Do it.
   • "synapse malfunction"-That's what's happening to you, eh?
   • "what stage of scizophrenia brings out cursing"-The stage when they need to lock you up. For good.
   • "nostril blocked by small bone"-The dude tried to steal Rusty's meal and then he sneezed.
   • "what gives you insane nightmares"-Search phrases like yours.
   • "cant get full nights rest dream"-That's right. Repeat after me: 'Can't sleep. Clown's gonna eat me'.
   • "the great deluge is at hand"-That's RIGHT! Didn't you HEAR the announcement from f*cking NOAH? Build an ARK and get IN THERE QUICK.
   • "are you dead when you are on anesthesia?"-If you were dead genius, you wouldn't be able to WAKE UP afterwards.
   • "greek monster cyst pictures"-I've got a MONSTROUS cyst right on my BUTT. Email me for pictures!
   • "can't complete my sentances medication"-That's RIGHT. Can't SPELL, either. Better hurry with your medication.
   • "i get zits on random parts of my body"-So do I. It's totally DISGUSTING, so stay away from the opposite sex, cause they'll make FUN of you.
   • "how to survive as a f*cking loser"-If you are on this page, you are doing PRETTY GOOD.
   • "how do you force schizophrenics to take medicine"-You beat them with a STICK.
   • "alien invasion parasites prison"-Got THAT right. If alien parasites invade you, you'll go to prison.
   • "what does it mean when dogs bark at you continuously?"-It means you are an IDIOT. Dogs can sense IDIOCY.
   • "dog bark meanings"-See above.
   • "can cats sense death approaching?"-Why don't you ASK them?.
   • "the devil is attacking me on my job"-Put a BIBLE next to you on your DESK!
   • "causes of chest vibrations"-Masturbation?
   • "i have cancer of the soul"-Lower you EGO, sport. That's the ONLY reliable WAY to cure that.
   • "what cause ass cancer and what is its symptoms?"-Causes: Lots of ass f*cking. Symptoms: Illiterate SEARCHES, like YOURS.
   • "cannabis triggers my paranoia"-Then STAY THE f*ck AWAY from it, MORON! Geez...
   • "faulty premise - how is it used in mind control victim"-SOMEBODY prescribe some Zyprexa to this person, QUICK.
   • "the mind works on control because alien slaves are watching"-For THIS guy we need a combo of Stelazine, Zyprexa, Risperdal AND Abilify. QUICK.
   • "abilify illuminati"-This guy ALREADY knows what's GOOD for his mind's Illuminati conspiracies: Abilify.
   • "you can make me bleed internally"-WHO? ME? The search engine? ANYONE? Are you ALRIGHT? I guess not. Call 911.
   • "God save the queer"-Request DENIED. God HATES faggots.
   • "figure out if your possessed"-I think you better figure out how to SPELL first and THEN ask AGAIN.
   • "permanently stuffed nostril remove"-Let's all give this fella some HELP to REMOVE his permanently stuffed NOSTRIL.
   • "sound clicking inside nose"-We have a malfunctioning CYBORG here, folks!
   • "she has a snake tail"-Your girlfriend? Be VERY careful...
   • "is human flesh digestable"-Yes, it is. Are you related to Dr. HANNIBAL LECTER by any chance?
   • "how to bring back a schizophrenic patient to reality"-Show him a chick with very large BOOBS. It works, guaranteed.
   • "how to get rid of bad luck"-You CAN'T. You've been dealt a BAD DEAL in life. WELCOME to the club of LOSERS.
   • "how does science tie into demonic possession"-Don't you WORRY about that. Just keep taking your Zyprexa and leave the advanced stuff for the psychiatrists.
   • "nuke the f*cking planet already"-Now THERE's a promising politician I would vote for!
   • "what actually happens when you step on a rusty nail?"-Why don't you TRY IT and find out YOURSELF?
   • "headaches when need to shit"-That's a very SERIOUS condition. Almost as bad as your illiteracy.
   • "they don't know they are being f*cked"-No, "they" DON'T. But I DO. And so are YOU.
   • "how many advils can i take in a day"-Swallow a WHOLE BOTTLE at once. You will REALLY feel better, immediately.
   • "how many advils does a bottle contain?"-Do you KNOW how to COUNT, dude?
   • "how many advils do adults take?"-Um, as many as they need?
   • "cannot have love"-The very FACT that you are ALIVE, moron, is proof that someone HAS loved you.
   • "I lost the love of my life"-AWWWWW!!! Ain't that SAD. Stare HARD at some porno images for a WEEK, jerk-off often and try AGAIN after a while. GOOD LUCK!.
   • "heroin: It makes me forget everything"-If you DOUBLE the dose, you'll forget even MORE. For GOOD! GO for it, sport!
   • "why does demerol feel so good"-Because it's a derivative of MORPHINE? If you keep taking this stuff, you'll end up IN THE STREETS, sport.
   • "cystic acne is a pain in the ass"-Of COURSE it is. Cause you get cysts ON your ass, as well. Welcome to the club of losers.
   • "what if you have zits on your arm pits"-What about it? You will just be DISGUSTING to the opposite sex. No big deal.
   • "cysts under arms"-WELCOME! More members in the CLUB of LOSERS!
   • "what is in a cyst? puss"-This guy ANSWERS his own question to HELP the search engine. Google should send him a THANK you note.
   • "cyst under your arm with puss show a picture how it looks"-It looks DISGUSTING. Trust me, I KNOW.
   • "why cysts form on the scrotum"-Because you have hidradenitis suppurativa. Visit your dermatologist, but I'll tell you what: the prognosis DOESN'T look good, sport. It's an INCURABLE and UGLY disease.
   • "i am disgusting evil putrid"-Don't worry, friend. We all are. Some are HIDING it better than others.
   • "I want to blow my brains out"- Do us all a FAVOR and DO IT!! Then we'll have one less IDIOT to deal with.
   • "suicide situation gun on head what to do?"-See ABOVE!!.
   • "is suicide illegal in Crete?"-YES, it's illegal. You will be fined 10,000 dollars if you do it.
   • "you are f*cked"-We ALL are, friend. Haven't you heard the news? There's a SUCKER born every minute.
   • "i am a f*cking idiot"-If you SAY so, who am I to argue?
   • "my brother is a f*cking idiot"-This family sure is a winner.
   • "games for people with memory problems"-Are you gonna remember the rules?
   • "schizophrenia talking god"-You've got that ALMOST right. It's THE DEVIL talking to you in schizophrenia.
   • "see meaning in everything schizophrenia"-That's RIGHT. If you see MEANING in EVERYTHING, you are ready for the LOONY-BIN.
   • "chaos schizophrenia"-Somebody's VERY VERY sick...
   • "what is late stage schitzophrenia"-It's exactly what you have.
   • "funny schizophrenic phrases"-This guy thinks that schizophrenia is "funny". Let's all wish he gets the disease so he can have some "fun".
   • "it is something like"-YES? Go ON. What IS it LIKE, friend?
   • "mercedes 600 SEC"-Somebody's dreaming out LOUD...
   • "haven't slept for ages!"-Poor guy! Try MASTURBATING and DRINKING MILK before going to bed and call me tomorrow.
   • "what does it mean when you have a bubble in your compass"-It's a CONSPIRACY by the ILLUMINATI so that you get lost in the woods. WATCH OUT for Blair Witch.
   • "what's the f*cking point"-There IS none. You've guessed it. Can you bare the truth YET or do we have to invent a NEW RELIGION for ya?
   • "borderline world-saving"-We have an UNDECIDED MESSIAH here, fellas. Let's all give him a HELPING HAND.
   • "tranxene is good shit"-This one feels he needs to BROADCAST his latest buzz with the drug and possibly CONFIRM it.
   • "unexplained messages"-Here's one for you: &%@$!#*(%)DTW#$@.
   • "clear out black holes in face"-That's pretty damn hard, dude: You'd have to calculate the black holes' Schwarzschild radii, first.
   • "god nasal polyps"-THIS one has me STUMPED...
   • "weeping polyps"-It's a sad little polyps...
   • "how to ease cystic acne"- You CAN'T: You've been dealt a BAD DEAL in life: Read my lips: BAD GENES. Don't procreate, please...
   • "how to approach people with paranoia"-Um, VERY carefully?
   • "meaning of hallucination of buzzing mosquito"-YEAP. Those evil pests can cause severe hallucinations.
   • "chest pains while dreaming"-And HOW exactly did you FEEL those chest pains if you were DREAMING?
   • "skin disease's"-Uh oh. Not only BAD GENES, but illiteracy as well. LOSING combination.
   • "my skin pores are blocked with white puss"-HEY! WELCOME to the CLUB. Now go get a gun and I will tell you afterwards what you have to do.
   • "super sensitive person ugliness stupidity"- You are UGLY, STUPID and SUPER SENSITIVE? You have my condolences. Nature will take care of you, don't worry.
   • "scientific explanation for an ugly face"- This person is trying to understand why they are UGLY. As if, if an explanation existed, it would make things EASIER for them. Welcome to the club of LOSERS, friend.
   • "get the f*ck out of my mind"-Uh oh! Somebody has been visited by "the voices". Go have some STELAZINE, prescribed to you QUICK, dude!
   • "drugs to make you sleep forever"-You'll have PLENTY of time to do that when you DIE. Now, snap OUT of it.
   • "want to sleep and not wake up"-You'll have PLENTY of time to do that when you DIE. Now, snap OUT of it.
   • "self-termination"-MORE Stelazine, please!
   • "paranoia of the frontier"-The Doctor said we should say "yes" to whatever you say. RELAX, now.
   • "malignant forces outside the house"-The SCHIZOPHRENIC with the CHAIN-SAW, waiting outside. Better plan your excursions CAREFULLY. People are not SUPPOSED to leave their houses.
   • "I have a cyst on my left butt cheek"-Does it HURT?
   • "universe attacking me"-What's with the SCHIZOS, lately?
   • "schizophrenia barking like a dog"-Somebody call 911, QUICK.
   • "after 80 hours sleep insane"-What EXACTLY are you trying to do, sport?
   • "a person awake after century"-This guy stayed asleep for a WHOLE CENTURY! GET BACK TO WORK NOW, lazy idiot!
   • "how to make advils"-Why? What do you have in mind? Email me. Maybe I can help.
8. Illucidity, Nonsense, Bullshit!
   • ""Someone who is always wrong" name"-YOU. It's YOU, dude.
   • "I wonder if your tolerance of pain is the inverse of the amount of money you have?"-ALMOST correct, sport. Not your TOLERANCE of pain though, but PAIN ITSELF is related to the amount of money in your bank account. ZERO money -> INFINITE PAIN. LOTS of money -> negligible pain.
   • "block pump mid fluo red united"-What are you trying to MAKE, sport? A flying SOCCER team?.
   • "real smurfs"-Let's find some REAL Smurfs for a change. The imaginary ones are BORING.
   • "perceiving to perform"-The piano. Perceiving to perform THE PIANO.
   • "philia, agape, eros, chairs, pathos"-The five MAJOR sentiments as exemplified by the Ancient authors: Friendship, love, eros and passion for... BIG lazy-boy CHAIRS.
   • "what type of dog are good for knowing good and evil"-The BIG, HAIRY kind that bites BADLY when angered/annoyed. The Bobtail or English Sheep Dog.
   • "nonexistent screws that spell out idiot"-Those screws are NON-EXISTENT, dude. YOU are the idiot.
   • "f*cked by mistake"-The princess has been had. Let's lend her a hand finding some good counselling services.
   • "longing for something but dont know what"-A WOMAN you f*cking retard, a WOMAN. Get on with the f*cking program.
   • "is there a free will gene?"-What the...?.
   • "void beautiful words"-Here are some: "     " and "  ".
   • "noole mind"-The NOOLE mind: The mind of a RETARD.
   • "if venus is immortal then can they die"-If the planet Venus or the Goddess of beauty is immortal, then, can "they" die? Why?.
   • "who wrote the quote 'i beg my mirror image'?"-Somebody totally bonkers? He'd have to be, if he prays to his mirror image.
   • "how to access the alternate realities with your mind to be trained as a warrior"-Somebody notify the police before this guy does any damage.
   • "A symbol has two levels of meaning: a literal level and a symbolic level"-Almost. The symbolic level can have infinitely many SUB-levels. Take a look.
   • "systemic formula for godhood"-It's hidden somewhere in my web pages!
   • "I burst my nose"-What can I say? The guy put some C4 in his nose and lit the fuse.
   • "serial killers that ate genitals and buttcheecks"-Hungry, demented and schizophrenic serial killers. This guy wants to know more.
   • "i can see the veil!"-BRAVO, dude! Thanks for announcing it, too. We now know what we can do with you.
   • ""find a derelick spaceship""-With QUOTES, too. He is sure the spelling is 'DERELICK'. Anyone know of any DERELICKs?
   • "tri state spook light is double refracted headlights"-EASY now, ol'timer.
   • "the veil and exercise"-It's the NEW muslim trend: Veiled women who exercise in public!
   • "fire chess configuration"-It's the famous FIRE chess configuration! Wins every time!
   • "will deviate"-WHO will? You? Call 911: Another DEVIANT on the net.
   • "whoever follows me will never suffer missfortune, but will always have good"-Will never suffer 'miss fortune', eh? And good WHAT? Candies? Potatoes? Marshmallows? Chewing-gum? It's an "E" and more Bible lessons for this idiot.
   • "as if you never existed"-Why 'as if'? Do you think you are important enough to think you DO exist?
   • "humorous wave functions"-That's RIGHT. Let's have some new, HUMOROUS Schroendinger wave functions, for a change. The old ones are pretty boring.
   • "plato banned christian no see god"-Plato was a "banned" Christian, eh?. He was NOT allowed to see God. Bummer.
   • "how to right about you'are creative beast mind"-You start by learning how to SPELL and form syntactically CORRECT sentences. So it's back to SCHOOL for you, idiot.
   • "stroking my face"-Do you do that OFTEN, dude?
   • "what starts with a E and ends with a E and contains one letter"-The letter "E" ITSELF, idiot!
   • "holy flying horse f*cks"-This fella either saw something REALLY interesting or is looking for pegasus porno. WooHoo!
   • "love can never be betrayed the same way as a tree"-Why, I didn't know that TREES could be betrayed. Thanks for telling us!
   • "dragon swallowed princess"-YES. The dragon swallowed the princess WHOLE. Before the knight-prince managed to get there and save her. BUMMER!
   • "www.f*cking the puss i came from"-Searching for the website: www.f*ckingthepussicamefrom.com. Wonder what are its features...
   • "sacrificial men are usually matrix trilogy"-Whatever you say, buddy. Don't you forget your Geodon now, you hear?
   • "|chicken||turkey|sin(theta)|"-That's RIGHT. The exact relationship is: |turkey*sin(theta)| = |chicken|. It's part of grandma's MATHEMATICALLY ADVANCED cooking recipes.
   • "man standing on the centre of 4 element and angel"-This must surely be Saint John the Evangelist contemplating writing the Revelation. Or a stoner who has taken a good dose of LSD.
   • "what is a shoe repair man"-It's a man who builds nuclear devices for a living.
   • "drilled and filled samples"-Drilled with a Black & Decker. Filled with cheese, of course...
   • "murphy's law, math representation"-Looking for a mathematical model for Murphy's Law, eh? Here it is: 'The moment you think it's x, it changes to not x'. When you figure out what it means, give us a ring...
   • "murphy's law choose the fastest supermarket line"-This guy is trying to solve the famous Murphy's Law Puzzle: 'The supermarket line you are in, is always the slowest'. YooHoo! Murphy's Law puzzles cannot be solved, genius!
   • "birthday curse phrases"-It's not enough that somebody has grown older by one more year, this guy wants to CURSE them.
   • "internal structureof f*ck"-Our wannabe mad scientist got SIDETRACKED, it seems...
   • "are priests really relevant?"-Always. They are ALWAYS relevant, no matter what the subject. Be careful.
   • "cousin penis"-This feller is searching for info/photos of his/her cousin's penis ON THE NET. Let's HELP him/her a little.
   • "what kind of logic will the alien slaves use when human slave control ends"-Somebody call the local asylum. QUICK!.
   • "universe not ruled by logic"-The universe is ruled FINE. It's YOUR logic that sucks, Einstein.
   • "it is not provided in shareware version"-AWWWW! That SCHUCKS!
   • "NT society secret"-That's RIGHT. Windows NT users are a secret society. Their motto is: 'Use Windows NT!'.
   • "exists inside your mind"-That's RIGHT. STUPIDITY exists inside your MIND.
   • "schroedinger murphy drive"-That's Enterprize's new TELETRANSPORTER engine, based on Murphy's Law and the Schroedinger wave function collapsing RANDOMLY. It can transfer you to any random location in the universe. And LEAVE you there.
   • "it is hard to be an optimist"-Sure is. Particularly in view of this PAGE.
   • "optimistic visualization"-No such thing.
   • "married hotel in bukarest"-This guy married an entire HOTEL. What do you expect? In bukarest hotels are CHEAP and AVAILABLE.
   • "i f*ck with your mind like an algebra equation"-A DANGEROUS TELEPATH on the loose. A dangerous PARANOID MATHEMATICIAN telepath.
   • "things that are real that looks like an isosceles triangle"-I think you better learn syntax FIRST, and search for such objects, LATER.
   • "what are the changes size of the computer for the pass 50"-The changes size of the computer for the pass 50 is 3x5+15!
   • "is damn a curse word punishable by law"-YES! Be VERY CAREFUL when you use this word. It carries penalties of jail sentences of over 3 years!
   • "bach table reach third cock f*ck"-A SEVERELY disturbed computer user.
   • "sun wears boobs light bulbs ultraviolet"-EASY NOW, buddy! The ambulance is on its way, as we speak!
   • "vulcan language dumb shit"-This fella wants to say something to SPOCK. Something NASTY.
   • "virus looney magdalena"-Is this a NEW virus you are looking for, or are you simply RETARDED?
   • "wow magdalena renyi"-Another retarded computer user.
   • "greek suitcase"-Don't worry friend. We'll carry all your personal belongings for you. Now OFF YOU GO to the HOSPITAL.
   • "hitler born to be alive read my lips download"-Another idiot playing with the Search Engine.
   • "souvlaki pussy for sex f*ck"-This guy is contemplating vacations in GREECE. Or putting a whole souvlaki inside somebody's pussy. Yeah, we get the CREATIVE types here, as well...
   • "know what i look like naked"-This guy simply wants to know what he looks like naked. That's not much to ask. And he is looking for it ON THE NET!
   • "addictive personality proliferate survival throughout history"-You never know WHO you are going to meet on the internet. This one sounds like an interesting one.
   • "hold me now polyp"-Hold on TIGHT! We've already called 911. Don't you WORRY!
   • "dream yelled at"-Were you REALLY yelled at in your dream? Awww! Schucks!
   • "pink colored kitchen utensils"-We have Bozo-the-Clown here, folks, having an insatiable DESIRE to start cooking! Let's all give him a HELPING HAND!
   • "a paragraph on a kind and compassionate act is often its own reward"-If YOU say so...
   • "cunt tracker"-I've heard of virus trackers, html page trackers, but what the heck is a 'cunt tracker'. Does it need to be 'installed' somewhere?
   • "diverging soul"-I think this guy is a little confused with mathematics and psychology.
   • "why women fall in love with assholes"-They tend to do that, yeah. Perhaps you should direct a study and provide for some serious correlations.
   • "do women crave big penis?"-No. They crave ASSHOLES. See above.
   • "why women are stupid"-I have no idea. Try interacting with some and you'll soon find out.
   • "in your rest, Lord"-Yes, Lord. Bless us WHILE YOUR ARE RESTING, so WE CAN REST, TOO!
   • "kindergarten on the sky"-Yeap. It's a SPECIAL kindergarten for gifted kids which was built to SAVE them from all the IDIOTS who perform STUPID SEARCHES.
   • "how stupid gene activation takes place"-It all starts when you search for phrases like this one!
   • "bull cunt"-What do you have in mind, genius?
   • "dragon swallowed stomach -sun -moon -bible -saint -margaret"-Check the JUDICIOUS use of the EXCLUDED references!
   • "function of a veil"-Yeap. It's the function F(veil). Pretty useful function in MATH.
   • "greek mythology references american express card"-You won't find references of the American Express cards in Greek mythology. Don't you KNOW the Ancient Greeks were using MasterCard?
   • "knowitall manual"-A manual that describes ALL of it, eh? Try having kids and you will be able to write your VERY OWN very soon!
   • "if a guy has big feet... phrase"-How about: "If a guy has big feet, he's a f*cking HOBBIT"? Is your name FRODO, by any chance?.
   • "pleasure eases pain"-Depends on whether you are a masochist or not, dude.
   • "engraving disadvantages"-Whatever you say.
   • "meaning of you are getting there!"-This fella doesn't know what 'getting there' means. Try more searches like this and you'll be 'getting there' very soon!
   • "f*ck origin"-Is that as 'f*ck our origins' or as 'origins of f*cking'?
   • "you know you are a * if"-What's with the wildcard character? DORK? f*ckhead, moron, idiot? What are you looking for, friend?
   • "transformation pig or cow"-Sounds like a GOOD CHOICE to me. How are you gonna go about it?
   • "pain whore"-Is she giving BIRTH?
   • "whore of heaven"-Hmmmmmm...
   • "how people became so numb"-I'd rather want to know how people became so DUMB.
   • "pregnant cow transform computer boyfriend"-What in God's name is this person looking for?
   • "f*ck"-What EXACTLY are you looking for? Hoping to get laid via the net?
   • "shit baths"-Beats me. I have no idea what this guy's looking for, although one could easily arrange for such a thing. No need to search the net, dude...
   • "girl hypnosis transformation cow"-This guy wants to hypnotize a girl so he can...transform her into a cow. Way to go, dude!
   • "Pneuma lyrics"-Beats me. Maybe SPIRITUALS? Who knows.
   • "Something resembles a certain card"-A visually impaired man looking at his American Express card? Do you KNOW me? That's why I always carry one of THESE...
   • "doctor's resume"-There's only ONE doctor WITHOUT a name: Doctor WHO. And he doesn't HAVE a resume. He is a FICTIONAL TIMELORD for crying out loud....
   • "bursting cyst on brain"-Is that what's causing you to perform searches like this?
   • "exactly the other side of the globe"-Yeap, that's where I am, alright. Why do you ask?
   • "'go through procedure'"-Yeap, better hurry with that lobotomy, cause your searches are stupid.
   • "inside nostril is different"-Different from WHAT, exactly?
   • "pretend to be a gypsy"-You DO that, fella, and come back after a year of nomadic and filthy life and tell us what it's like.
   • "composer global constraint local search"-OKAY...
   • "machines that man makes, make man a machine"-YEAH! GO for it BABY...
   • "clarification in silver"-YEAP. One NEEDS some clarification in silver. Otherwise,..., I don't know.
   • "man's brain exposed"-Don't go NEAR this guy. I am not sure his intentions are all that pure.
   • "f*ck you, stupid search program!"-Easy now, fella. Remember that whatever search program you use, pretty much reflects YOUR stupidity.
   • "tutorial"-Hey, you've found one, here. Use it well.
   • "i liked to say i could trust you"-And now you don't LIKE it anymore? What a shame! TRUST me WITHOUT saying it, then.
   • "women are not men machines"-Course they aren't. They are WOMEN machines.
   • "baseball dog logos"-A dog which plays baseball and talks at the same time? Who knows what this guy's looking for...
   • "faith and the electric dog"-WHAT THE HECK is an 'electric dog'? Does it bite?
   • "f*ck you"-WHO's 'you', perfesser?
   • "why will a dog starve around food?"-Um, because you forgot to unleash him?
   • "woman finds shit in car radio"-NO SHIT! What did she do about it?
   • "the most horrible paradigms"-ON WHAT, sport? On Philosophy? Painting? Engineering? Writing? When you decide, let us know and we'll find something for ya.
   • "uh, I don't know. Why am I doing at this stupid search engine"-I DO! You are a bored college student, trying to do HOMEWORK?
   • "you got to be f*cking stupid search engine"-No: The search engine is FINE. YOU are the one who's STUPID.
   • "f*ck off and die you stupid f*cking search engine"-EASY now!
   • "what the f*ck kinda search phrase is this?"-THAT's what I am wondering, TOO!
   • "phrases with shit"-Do you want MAYO on those, too?
   • "what should cleaning lady do"-Um, clean the house and then, MAYBE, give the owner a blowjob? What is it with these questions with obvious answers?
   • "cleaning lady gives him a blowjob"-SEE? This guy ALREADY knows the answer.
   • "faith the human dog"-Yes, have FAITH in the human dog. The HUMAN DOG is our SAVIOR.
   • "what do logos convey?"-It's the NEW OS for Macs, operating using the Mathematical function LOG(z).
   • "samples"-Of WHAT kind, genius? Porno? Music? Programming?
   • "infinite subs"-CHECK IT OUT! The new Russian well kept secret. Better notify the PENTAGON, quick.
   • "maria's turtles"-You LIKE'em, eh? Do you like Maria as well?
   • "summary of faith and the electric dogs"-WTF?
   • "the boss's desk"-Pretty impressive, huh? When you get a promotion, you'll get a desk just like this one. Meanwhile, BACK TO WORK!!
   • "prettiest woman's body"-Uh, huh. Is THIS what you are thinking while on the job?
   • "I recollect a wondrous moment"-I DO TOO: When you were smarter. As it is, you REMAIN an idiot.
   • "gradient of desire"-Yeap. It often points UPWARDS, too!
   • "the significance of motionless"-Yeap, there's lots of significance in motionless. Cause that's DEATH, genius.
   • "brain airbrush"-YEAP! Sprays mushed grey matter!
   • "contradictory behavior"-Haven't you HEARD the latest NEWS? Contradiction is GOD.
   • "hairy chest superstition"-I guess most males have this PROBLEM!
   • "cage probably causes paranoia"-Um, I think you are RIGHT about THAT: If you put one in a CAGE, chances are one will go insane. Did your parents put you in one when you were an adolescent?

Here's your prize!

• "If you could talk to a dead person, what will be the topic and why?" - Uhm, how to avoid ending up like you? or something similar such. AFTER you figure out how to actually talk to something that doesn't exist, of course.
• "How do you stop a fluorescent light from working?" - Most of the questions I've seen have been of the 'how do you MAKE a fluorescent light work' kind. Until today. This dude wants to shut all fluorescent lights down, but doesn't know how. Use a large jack-hammer friend, since apparently you aren't aware of any switches lying around.
• "How small an object, accelerated to 99.999% of the speed of light, would be required to destroy the Earth in a collision?" - Am I rightfully worried that this is some JW's witness trying to implement Armaggedon or is it just a plainly stupid and useless question? Can't tell.
• "Why does cannabis give me a direct route to opening my spiritual subconscious?" - This good sh*t stoner still hasn't figured it out and is not sure. Try this, friend.
• "What type of things do you pray for? Are there examples of God answering such prayers in the Bible? Do you confuse God with a genie that grants wishes?" - If God sees this, he will probably decide to strike this guy with blindness to prevent him from spreading his stupidity through the eyes. Let's hope He doesn't.
• "Why is there no negative zero?" - Gulp! Dude, Mathematics is not in the business of explaining why things DON'T exist, unless necessary. Why doesn't a gigantic invisible porcelain tea-pot not exist in orbit around Jupiter? Why indeed. Let's logically analyze that.
• "Have I always been a problem to people, or do people really not like me?" - Expecting efficient behavioral psychoanalysis through anonymous abstract questioning. Without providing even so much as a clue about past behavior. Any volunteer psychoanalysts? Anyone?
• "Which ones are the most common points between spirituality and religion, and why?" - How about: Similar unadulterated and dangerous for your rational sanity illogical bullcrap, with no hope of logically resolving or applying to anything any time soon. If you haven't figured this out already, there's no hope for you.
• "During a Nuclear Holocaust scenario, why would anyone want to stay alive?" - Why indeed. Maybe because the desire to NOT die is instictually fundamental and found in all biological life forms? How about that. Like asking: 'Why would anyone want to stay alive in any life-threatening situation?' Because otherwise YOU DIE moron.
• "How long do you think Elon Musk will last as the richest man?" - Jesus H. Christ on a marshmallow-stick. I don't even have the strength to sarcastically comment on this. The incoming wave of stupidity after reading it completely incapacitated my brain.
• "Why do some people say I need to have a religion to be a good person?" - How about, because they've been BRAINWASHED by their religion into thinking that the ONLY way to morality is through their religion? Try it friend. You never know whether it will benefit you or not. Particularly if you have no clue about your very own morality.
• "Is thought powerful enough to understand it's proximity to a black hole's event horizon? If a thought tells me it is there, yet light itself can not escape it, then thought is faster than light?" -Now, THAT's what I call your next ingenious budding science (fiction) writer. Way to go dude!
• "When do beliefs become confused as facts?" -When absurd non-facts become beliefs? Just sayin...
• "Were the 6-day creation of God really 24 hours per day?" -Not really. Days only just appeared this long to observers outside the Garden of Eden. God was working really fast at relativistic speeds, making it look like only 6 days long to external observers. In reality it was more like 5 billion years long.
• "What human development theory makes sense?" -The one that's verified mostly by scientific evidence, dummy. The theory that says we've been created by aliens and were H-bomb nuked into conscious existence as soul parasites in humans by overlord Xenu.
• "Why is it that every time I walk in my garage and the lights are off, I always imagine a man hanging, but when I turn the lights on, he is not there?" -Cause you've been watching too many horror movies? Time to start thinking about getting some professional help, dude.
• "Why do we humans leave lights on all night even when it's obvious that no one is nearby?" - Why do you ask? Can't you just come up with ANY random self-satisfying logical reason?
• "Why is the world never peaceful?" - Now there's your average budding historian/philosopher.
• "Do you believe that what we call life might just be God playing a game like Minecraft or Civilization?" - Does it matter what I believe? No. Does it matter what anyone believes? NO. Because you cannot know if God exists or not. Get a clue and stop wasting screen electrons with useless questions.
• "Why is God still the best doctor?" - Cause if he wasn't a good doctor, you'd already be DEAD, genius.
• "What is the acceleration of a 3-kilogram object (blue)?" - It's (Force/3kg) * |575/wavelength(blue) (nm)|, since it appears blue (therefore it's been blue shifted). Blue objects accelerate faster than red objects.
• "How did scientists observe the visible universe?" - What tha...
• "Has physics demonstrated that the universe doesn't have intention?" - Yes. The latest Physics results indicate that it stopped caring after the emergence of the largely uncontrolled phenomenon of Stupid People in Large Groups, of which the Universe is very afraid.
• "How would you feel if life had an undo button?" - It's true: Now this forum is a very interesting place to ask all kinds of nonsense-abstract survey psychology questions. Don't forget to answer with your very important opinion. It will always be taken into serious consideration by the asker.
• "Is there a possibility for us to know something with certainty bypassing our senses? How come?" - Sigh... Questions like these are virtual proof that some humans still think they are brains in vats. The Matrix thingy has gone too far...
• "A big, clearly formed golden orb showed up in my room this morning. I don't think it was a ghost orb. What do orbs mean?" - Somebody call the FBI. New alien contactee case.
• "What is research on the limits of function at a point or infinity stating life applications on it?" - Holy Cow!
• "How does the emergence of evolving life benefit an evolving universe? " - "Benefit"? What in the name of Jesus Almighty can be a "benefit" to the Universe? How do you plan on measuring it? How about telling us first what that is?
• "Have you ever licked your teacher's feet? " - As if if any reader had the experience, he/she'd bother answering non-anonymously and risk being ridiculed publically.
• "What could make one blind man and another man see, make one strong building and one another down? " - Wtf? This doesn't even parse correctly.
• "Are angels faster than the speed of light?" - Absolutely. Especially dark ones. They always recede into darkness at the speed of light, whenever a light source is present.
• "I get moments where I feel like nothing is real and that my life and everything around me is an illusion. Why is this? Should I go to the doctor?" - Definitely. Otherwise they'll conjure a court order to lock you up.
• "How do you avoid becoming an energy you are surrounded with the most without being consumed by it?" - Just a sec: I'll feed this question to my new Turing Test Machine and will be back in a jiffy with the answer.
• "Why do people get mad at God or say it doesn't exist for certain things that they don't like about anything in the world when we just don't know why those things in the world are like this?" - Can ANYONE figure out what this guy is asking about? I can't.
• "Can a schizophrenic be an anarcho-capitalist?" - Sometimes I wonder if people are just simulating stupidity just to annoy and/or provoke.
• "What type of images do teenagers keep in their phones?" - Now that's what I call an interesting question. So interesting, it's been asked about a thousand times already.
• "How many drops of visine can I use on my third eye?" - Obviously a meager attempt at cheap humor. Wonder what the heck kind of answer does this dude expect...
• "If the Antichrist was an outer space alien, is that why the entire world is prophesied to be amazed by him?" - Great & interesting question! If my grandmother had cart-wheels instead of legs, is that why the engineering-doctors predicted that people would be amazed by her speed?
• "How do you request the universe for help?" - Gulp! Posted in the "Astrophysics" space, among others. A disappointed/depressed amateur/professional astronomer? Or a confused 11-year old, with serious pre-adolescent issues.
• "Will Jesus in his second coming be able to shoot lightning bolts from his fingertips?" - Definitely! His second coming will be an absolute blast, with him having all the abilities Superman had, including laser eyes and being able to fly on the run. I don't think he'll wear a cape though.
• "When one does not know what it is then it is something when one knows what it is it is nothing what is it?" - Can ANYONE understand this question?
• "What happened to Jesus after his baptism?" - The usual. He went bonkers and started believing that his father was somebody else and not Joseph. Somebody who found his way into secretely impregnating his mother without her permission. Bastard children often have a bad sync reaction after finding out that at least one of their parents is a John Doe.
• "I have 3 stars on the Saturn mount, and 2 star on the life line of my hand. I've heard there are very negative things on those stars. Is it true?" - Posted in space: "Stars (astronomical objects)". Go figure.
• "If we outlawed internet usage while intoxicated, what would drop the most, internet usage or alcoholism?" - My jaw beat them both. It dropped the most as soon as I read your question.
• "What are the most common resistor values?" - What are the most common Capacitance values? Values of Watts? Volts? Amperes? Conductivity? Permeativity? Resistivity? Luminescence? Sound intensity? Color saturation? Chocking smoke inhalation values? Magnification values? Thickness? Size? Viscosity? Temperature? ANY unit value? Let's disassemble all devices and analyze all elements and spaces carefully and create an incidental statistical distribution table to answer this moron's question. Back to WORK, you lazy-asses!
• "If dragons existed, would they survive the impact of a celestial object?" - Jesus Christ Almighty Lord of Everything and Everyone...
• "Would we know if we were in a black hole?" - Almost. You are almost getting there as we speak, dude. Hold on tight and you'll soon find out. See picture above in Google search phrases section.
• "What is an unknown entity that looks like a blue small light not an orb it moves & can see & go through screens & disappears?" - I can't even fathom how to reply to this. Even sarcastically. It exceeds the powers of my sensible English syntax-forming comprehension rules and axioms.
• "Would you eat the moon if it were made of onions?" - I really can't understand why Quora allows such questions or doesn't kill them automatically, even in the "Hypothetical Scenarios" space. It just confirms my suspicion that it's turning into a huge garbage bin for irrelevant nonsense, fast.
• "What maslaye do you arestios each Queslies Liguht the lamp obthe tone?" - Is that some sort of unkown bastardized semi-Greek/English variant I am not aware of? Posted in "Lamps/Lighting" spaces. Go figure...
• "What if people in real life started a new religion worshipping Obi Wan as the son of God instead of Jesus?" - Posted in "Jesus" space. Jesus would double-facepalm on this, but you never know. This guy may have good intentions afterall.
• "Is it a sin to believe in ghosts?" - Absolutely. Other related sins: Believing in a huge porcelain teapot in orbit around Pluto, believing in Santa Claus, Mikey Mouse's detective abilities, in Little Red Riding Hood's telepathic abilities, etc.
• "Why do things that need to be caused to exist or happen need to be caused?" - Posted in "Philosophy" space. Sartre will be thinking of resurrecting any moment now to seek murdering the questioner...
• "How can I convert Allah to a God? How can we help him to bring out from Islam? How long will he work under Prophet Muhammad?" - Sombody's planning on helping "Allah" convert into a "real" God, so he isn't wasted as a Mohammedan subordinate. Can't comment any further on this except maybe excused by reason of insanity or something else such.
• "Why is believing in an afterlife healthy for us?" - Cause it helps us seggregate and isolate the morons for later extermination via flamethrower.
• "How do I make an item holy?" - Smoke some weed and after you get the urge from mother Nature, piss on it. The high THC content of your pee is guaranteed to make it very holy and ready to be used in ceremonies and prayers. Don't forget: Your well-used bong, is already holy, by the powers of the Goddess Eris or stoner Pope Episkopos Joe-anus.
• "Do you think you might be a light to warm up the world but the forces of darkness have conspired to dim you down?" - Definately. I am a very devout priest of Goddess Eris and stoner Pope Episkopos Joeanus and I am constantly fighting against the dark archons of lord Xenu who plans on nuking us all into the paleolithic age so he can be hosted in our minds parasitically without permission as a thetan. Posted in "Visible Light" space.
• "Is it true that when the rapture occurs there won’t be anymore time to prepare?" - Absolutely. You won't even have time to go to the bathroom. If you are already taking a dump, you will be snatched towards the sky with all the crap still on your butt.
• "Is right to said god is first in your life, before your mother, or is ok to put god first before your mother?" - Is right to said 1+1=2, or is ok to put 1+1=2? Enquiring minds want to know. Posted in "Theology", "Mothers", "God", and "Religion". If Santa Claus reads this, he will probably unload a big sh*t on this person's chimney instead of going down to unload his presents next Christmas. If his mother sees this before Santa Claus, she will probably ask the district-attorney to court-order him for the asylum of the dangerously mentally deficient.
• "Is it bad that I put a moonstone ring in the moonlight without cleansing it?" - Definitely. The daemon may get offended by its uncleanliness and may strike you blind after wearing it or using it inappropriately.
• "What would happen to humans if humans emitted high enough levels of ionizing radiation to affect LCD, Led, Oled and other screen types?" - Posted in "Ionizing Radiations", "Physics", "Radiations". Can't even begin to fathom how to answer this question. Probably coming from a chemtrail "sprayed" character, as they say here colloquially.
• "When God said "Let there be light" was it "Celestial light" or "Divine/Spiritual light? Because we're made to understand that the Heavenly bodies (sun, moon and stars) [Primary sources of light in deep space] were created on the fourth day" - It was BLACK Light. From a High Pressure Mercury Vapor Lamp. Dark, violetish, and fluorescing light that immediately revealed all the nasties hiding in the darkness. God was the first good Lighting Engineer. The rest is history.