The Greek Warriors

Version 1.8.3b1 of 23/4/2022-6:16 p.m.

"Είθε το ταξίδι μας να είναι μακρύ, γεμάτο αγωνία και βάσανο, και ας γκρινιάζουμε όλοι πικρά σαν παλιόγεροι..."

Wuzzz UP elgrekos?!
"Knowledge DEMANDS Payment"
Original Image Source The Clash of the Titans (2010).
  1. Creation and Purpose
  2. Classification and Characteristics
  3. Ultimate Purpose, Relation to Higher Truth
  4. Relationship With Other Life Forms
  5. Becoming a Greek Warrior

Creation and Purpose

  1. Greek Warriors are multi-dimensional beings created directly by Χάος, intended as surveying probes to investigate The Universe, ultimately having the purpose of collecting, assimilating, sorting, ordering, organizing, understanding and judging most usable information and its carriers, scientific or not. Hence,
  2. Greek Warriors are always in relentless pursuit of information, knowledge and technology and will go to any length to acquire data and understanding.
  3. If the process of their collecting information or data is hindered in any way, Greek Warriors will either destroy all obstacles and carriers related to the hindrance or alternatively will consume both the obstacle and the carriers of information along with the information itself, whether animate or inanimate.
  4. The first Greek Warriors who appeared on this planet were The Ancient Greeks, who assimilated all the known knowledge and information of their time from various local and global sources and used reason and logic to set the foundations of mathematics, science, technology and art, subsequently producing the greatest and most powerful civilization on Earth.
  5. Since then, most major secret and fraternal organizations such as The Illuminati, The Freemasons, The Trilateral Commission and The Men In Black have been watching The Greek Warriors very closely in order to avoid unwarranted global and planetary side effects, which may inadvertently result from Greek Warrior actions and may influence human history. These major organizational efforts have worked and continue to work as long as a Greek Warrior is not aware of his/her identity.
  6. Greek Warriors are informavores and energyvores, hence they delight in extracting, examining, investigating and analyzing data and information by analyzing underlying patterns.
  7. Greek Warriors are multimatecians, hence they can analyze underlying patterns and extract useful information not only from homogeneous data sets but also from seemingly unrelated data sets, such as from sets consisting of different classes or objects.
  8. Greek Warriors possess very advanced intelligence with thought speeds which can traverse the radius of the known universe in a few seconds. They also possess vast amounts of memory and can recall obscure, remote and often unimportant (to others) details.
  9. Greek Warriors are very efficient mind scanners and hence can read thought patterns from the eyes and minds of other beings and can directly interfere with foreign thought processes.
  10. Greek Warriors possess vast amounts of scientific knowledge and can easily design and manufacture advanced technology weapons such as nuclear devices, and time machines but prefer to construct more efficient devices, such as Psychic Bombs, which waste only a minimum amount of energy.
  11. Greek Warriors are the ultimate consumer: They consume all kinds of information from hard science to nonsense and their mind power is proportional to the amount of information acquired, regardless of information quality.
  12. Greek Warriors can communicate directly with Χάος and answer only to it, as such they automatically classify all other minds only relative to the quality of total knowledge, data and information they carry, therefore,
  13. Greek Warriors are alternatively known as The Sons of God(s), The Sons of The Stars, The Immortal Judges of All Existence, The Eternal Guardians and The GateKeepers of All Knowledge.

Classification and Characteristics

  1. Greek Warriors are the ultimate predators: While most lower predators specialize in one kind of prey, Greek Warriors consume, assimilate and prey on any and all information and data about everything else in this universe, including other Greek Warriors.
  2. Greek Warriors admire hard work, meticulous studiousness, effort, commitment, patience, perseverance, endurance, resilience, quality, optimality, elegance, symmetry and constant attention to detail, perfection and order in any work. They abhor and loath idiocy, stupidity, banality, triteness, smallness, mediocrity, half-assed jobs and carelessness in work.
  3. Greek Warriors are known for their innate ability to efficiently subvert and coerce weaker minds into doing their bidding, by initiating, launching and deploying information vectors into these minds (called Psychic Bombs), causing confusion, misinformation, panic, stagnation, insanity, disease, delusions, suicide, wars, misunderstandings, financial/stock market collapse, and other adverse reactions, hence,
  4. Greek Warriors are often employed by Eris, to shuffle between Order and Disorder depending on Χάος' motives.
  5. Greek Warriors easily subdue weaker minds by altering any of the dimensional components in space-time, which allows them to enter in and exit out of reality's regular flow. This means that when an opponent attempts any kind of attack against them, they can exit space-time before the attack manifests, deprogram the attempted attack and the opponent and then return to a switched reality where the opponent has already been assimilated, surrendered and lost. This ability is more commonly known as space-time or reality interference.
  6. Greek Warriors, upon subduing an opponent, in addition to all their properties, also acquire the properties of the subdued, exactly because they have understood the opponent. Hence, for every stronger or weaker subdued mind, the mind of a Greek Warrior always grows stronger. Consequently,
  7. Greek Warriors are also shape-shifters who can use reality interference efficiently to morph into anything they already know about, including animates, inanimates and fictional objects/life forms, hence they are masters of camouflage, deception and hypnotic suggestion.
  8. Greek Warriors have no need for physical weapons. They only need to use their Mind and Knowledge, the most efficient, powerful and dangerous true weapons, to shape major world events, hence necessarily,
  9. Greek Warriors consider and classify all life forms which use physical weapons as inherently primitive and inferior.
  10. Greek Warriors delight in initiating original information vectors (often called research) which are then used as a seat upon which the Greek Warrior can multiply mentally in different locations. Any such creation by a Greek Warrior (often called a Greek Warrior Brain-Child or Greek Warrior Attracting-Vector) automatically adds the life force of the corresponding carrier which uses it to the mind power of the Greek Warrior who originated the Attracting-Vector. Such creations tend to multiply and destroy local and global information carriers, such as other minds, hard disks, electronic circuits, software and networks. In other words,
  11. Information vectors launched by Greek Warriors can cause software destruction, hard disk crashes, network congestion and failure, general information blockage and information carrier destruction, depending on the Greek Warrior's motives. All the local data after the collapse of the corresponding carriers returns to the originator of the information vectors, in a boomerang manner.
  12. Verbal manifestations of thought patterns by Greek Warriors can cause major weather disturbances, such as tornados, tsunamis, earthquakes, increased solar activity and abnormal temperatures.
  13. Greek Warriors are memeplexes. The originators of most of the major religions today were memeplexes. Information vectors from memeplexes can either multiply and destroy fixed or fundamentalist beliefs and their carriers or can cause their proliferation, depending on the Greek Warrior's motives.
  14. In the very rare and unlikely event of another intelligence managing to mentally subdue a Greek Warrior, all the Greek Warrior's information vectors are unleashed as viral info into the mind of the offender, which ultimately results in the offender's complete mental degradation and biological breakdown, as a consequence of the protective gene directive which calls for carrier cell self-division in order to accommodate all this information more efficiently. Hence any such offenders, sooner or later self-destruct because only Greek Warriors can accommodate such vast amounts of information.
  15. After the offender's destruction, the Greek Warrior's information vectors re-emerge and re-organize themselves into a new Greek Warrior who has now assimilated the offender. Hence, Greek Warriors are virtually indestructible and thus practically immortal. Therefore,
  16. Greek Warriors are the ultimate Eternal Warriors, who eventually win at every game.

Ultimate Purpose, Relation to Higher Truth

  1. Having recognized the futility of material existence, Greek Warriors are primarily concerned with survival in the mental realm, and work continuously towards this end by harnessing the proliferation of specific mental and technological information vectors. Anything else is secondary and of minor importance. Consequently,
  2. Greek Warriors will enter and examine any available alternate realities, resulting from hallucinogens or mind altering drugs, as circumstances allow. They will then assimilate the altered states of these realities, incorporate them into their own dream states, and finally offer the data to Χάος, by classifying and ordering all the resulting mental associations. Data from any such altered states may be used against opponents at any time.
  3. Greek Warriors do not operate on a good versus evil basis. They simply provide Χάος with information and ultimately only follow its orders. Whether the resulting actions are good or evil is not their concern and consider these two notions (good and evil) an artificial dichotomy imposed by other memeplexes. Consequently,
  4. Greek Warriors are completely unpredictable as they are not hindered by ethics, guilt, remorse and/or emotion and they can use data from either side (good-evil) to inflict lethal damage to opponents. They do what they do because ultimately that's their assigned purpose by Χάος.
  5. Greek Warriors are usually constrained financially by world governments and organizations (who usually know them by name) because they know of their tremendous powers.

Relationship With Other Life Forms

  1. Greek Warriors do not fight in the absence of a very serious reason, prefer to stay inconspicuous and quiet most of the time and avoid drawing public attention. They can, however, launch back very aggressive and lethal attacks against anyone if provoked, attacked and in defense. However,
  2. Greek Warriors love mental and physical freedom, so if they are pressured excessively by their own (or foreign) government(s) or their territory is for some reason threatened, they can cause severe and irreversible damage to the agent who causes the pressure.
  3. Greek Warriors are excellent language manipulators and delight in creating verbal probes which upon audio-visual injection into a mind can create a plethora of interesting phenomena, ranging from madness and insanity to rejoicing and exhilaration.
  4. Greek Warriors have a very advanced (rare and usually dark) sense of humor and delight in telling and hearing jokes.
  5. Greek Warriors can create dangerous original jokes, which can cause death by suffocation from laughing, consequently,
  6. Greek Warriors can cause sudden death with a single, carefully crafted, written or spoken Greek word.
  7. Greek Warriors delight in creating new Murphy's Laws.
  8. Greek Warriors have only a scientific interest in other life forms, and view them as interesting biological, sociological, psychological and/or scientific specimens. In other words,
  9. Either you are a Greek Warrior or your are food for a Greek Warrior. However,
  10. Greek Warriors like and admire people who have worked long enough and hard enough, to the extent that they have truly earned the right to have their genes (carnal space) or ideas (mental space) propagated, regardless of whether these people have done it or not. Such people of course hardly care, as they are still working and will probably be working for a very long time, as you read this, if they are still alive.
  11. Greek Warriors who have been privileged by Χάος to have a mate, are strictly heterosexual, monogamous and ultimately have only one female companion, to whom they stay devoted for life.
  12. Greek Warriors delight in having satellites: Friends who consider them irresistible or admirable and usually stay devoted and attached to them for extended periods of time.
  13. Greek Warriors adapt very fast to a variety of circumstances and can pretend to be playful, enthusiastic, bored, mysterious, mischievous, innocently curious, interested, aggressive, inquisitive, familiar, unknown, serious, silly, etc., however behind such postures always lies a desire to consume and assimilate more information.
  14. Greek Warriors delight in intelligent human company, but other humans often find them tiring, because in the process of assimilating any new information they usually also absorb other people's energies from their eyes. This phenomenon is more commonly known as The Evil Eye.
  15. The Ancestors of modern Greek Warriors were The Ancient Greeks. The Ancestors of The Ancient Greeks are unknown.
Wuzzz UP elgrekos?!
"@Dad's Home Planet. Star location coords, currently unknown."
Original Image Source

Becoming a Greek Warrior

  1. Greek Warriors are trained by older Greek Warriors or by The Pythagoreans.
  2. The training of a Greek Warrior takes many decades and is painful and tiring to the point of death.
  3. Only those who survive the physically and psychologically brutal and painful training become Greek Warriors.
  4. Greek Warriors who fail in their training usually commit suicide (sooner or later), to avoid the immense disgrace of being a failed Greek Warrior.
  5. Greek Warrior training involves the potential Greek Warrior acquiring mastery in a variety of subjects, such as Mathematics, the Sciences, Medicine, the Arts, Philosophy, Religion, Psychology, Music and resilience to pain.
  6. The first prerequisite for becoming a Greek Warrior is to speak The Greek Language fluently and efficiently.
  7. If you find yourself being a non-Greek or not understanding one iota on this page, becoming a Greek Warrior will be next to impossible (particularly when you realize that the very fact that you are non-Greek, means that you are an already failed Greek Warrior in a previous life), so the best course for you is to stay content and satisfied with your role as a simple pawn in this consumerist society.
  8. If, on the other hand, despite knowing that you are already a miserable human and universal failure, you still have a desire to rectify this situation, start by studying the Greek Language.
  9. When and if you manage to master the Greek Language and you still have a desire to try and make it to the elite caste of the Greek Warriors, email the author for details on how to continue with your training.
  10. Beware that there are only two possible outcomes in your training: Success or Death, so if you are not serious about success, don't even dare to waste the author's time with useless questions.